SOUL DORM

69

Break it to me gently...

***

CHAPTER 69:

CONFESSION

Mars was undoubtedly the most careless person I knew. His selfish actions had driven me mad time and again. But tonight, for the first time, I wanted him to be that thoughtless boy. What if he didn't care? What if he ignored everything, just like he usually did? What if we both could just let go... stop caring... stop questioning... stop fearing...

But he didn't.

For the first time, he was the one being sensible. He slowed down, his lips gradually pulling away. His forehead rested against mine as he paused, eyes closed, breathing in sync with mine. His hand remained on my cheek, comforting. Even after he opened his eyes and lifted his head, his fingers lingered on my face, reluctant to break the connection.

"This just makes everything harder," he said. "Believe me."

I believed him. Even now, my heart thrashed against my ribcage, yearning to reach out to him again. I clenched my hands into fists to keep from touching him. My teeth tore at my lower lip to stay composed. What if we had continued? I would probably be trapped forever in my own mind's prison, alone in the dark. I knew Mars was protecting me, protecting himself, protecting us. But...

When he finally pulled away, there was no rational explanation that could soften the shock I felt. Nor was there anything to warm my trembling body as his touch might have. I feared I might be trapped in an eternal winter. I watched Mars grab a T-shirt from the corner and slip it over his head, then he left me in the bathroom and returned to the room. It took me a moment to collect myself and follow him. When I entered, Mars was lying on the bed, possibly asleep. His hand was pressed against his eyes, but he turned his head towards me when he heard my voice.

Slowly, I lay down next to him on the bed and pulled the blanket over me. I made sure to keep some distance between us, but I still lay facing him. We watched each other silently for a while. It seemed we had seen and lived through so much together that no words were left to say. I remained quiet and savored this transient moment. The pillow smelled like him. He was still close enough for me to reach out and touch. Despite the heart-wrenching sadness, I somehow felt safe next to him.

"Thank you," I said.

He was taken aback. "For what?"

"For not leaving me alone tonight. And... for saving me more than once."

He managed a faint smile. "You saved me too. If you hadn't thought of the staircase, we'd have been done for."

Remembering that moment made me look away. "We'd have been done for," I repeated. Wolves, teeth, blood... A shiver ran through me. It was terrifying how quickly fear could take over my body.

"Hey..." said Mars. "Stop thinking about it. We're both okay now. It's all behind us."

"Right..." I murmured. I tried to smile but couldn't shake the chill that clung to my skin. I pulled the blanket a little higher.

"You're shivering," Mars noted, his voice filled with concern. "Come here."

When he extended his arm, I hesitated momentarily. He was skilled at this. Gently, he pulled me close, pressed me against his chest, and wrapped his arm around me. His warmth quickly enveloped me, cocooning me safely once again. I asked tentatively, fearing I might disrupt the magic of the moment.

"Doesn't this make everything harder?"

"It definitely does..." he murmured. Yet, his lips touched my forehead, planting a kiss at the base of my hair. "Just one night..." His breath stirred my hair. "Sleep, Olive. I'm here."