Sometimes, explaining your feelings is as difficult as teaching someone a task you consider simple. Just like riding a bicycle, expert blindness can distance you from the experience of being a beginner.
Your feelings that you've shared with yourself for years, that you've only shared the secrets of your deepest thoughts to yourself. When the time comes, and somebody is reaching out to help you. You freeze, the emotion is there, but the feelings behind it, the root cause is deeper down and hidden away.
It's a ramble, no words can find their way out. It's a battle to try to teach someone the ways you feel as it's been just as difficult to hold onto them alone.
As with any skill, the skill of building up walls around you, you find yourself in a curse of knowledge, of your own deep dark thoughts that never can be released.
It's the paradox of wanting help, but not being able to receive it
Credits:
Photo by George Shervashidze: https://www.pexels.com/photo/macro-photography-of-woman-349308/
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Inside The Shifting Mind
Non-FictionThis collection will be an ongoing project sharing the thoughts of a bipolar mind, following confessional prose poetry, existential reflection, and reflective stream-of-consciousness. It's a safe space for me to share my deepest thoughts with the wo...
