i know my pain is such an imposition

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i know my pain is such an imposition,
i have no right to feel that way,
it looks like i have it all,
the perfect school, the perfect home, 
even my parents look perfect from the outside.
but it's all an illusion for me.
if you look behind my surface you'll see,
how i look at myself in the mirror,
a disgusted look full of hate,
how i hold onto my music and books,
since it's the only thing keeping me alive,
how i cry behind my desk,
because school's not as easy as it seems,
how i laugh with tears in my eyes,
always trying to pretend,
to hide my feelings away from the world,
because no one would belive me,
my pain looks like such an imposition.
i know.

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