Fractured Reflections

Chapter VI

Atsushi's POV

The next few days pass in a blur of missions and brief encounters, each one leaving me with more questions than answers.

Akutagawa is still as distant as ever, but there's something in the way he looks at me when he thinks I'm not paying attention. It's subtle, a flicker of something soft in his otherwise cold gaze.

But when I try to bring it up, he shuts me down, his sharp words cutting through any attempt at conversation.

It's maddening.

I'm standing outside the Agency, my hands stuffed in my pockets, staring at the fading light of the sunset. I should be preparing for the next mission, but my mind keeps drifting back to him.

To Akutagawa.

I'm not sure what it is about him that pulls me in so completely. Maybe it's the intensity of his emotions, hidden beneath layers of anger and pride. Or maybe it's the way he makes me feel... seen, in a way that no one else does.

I sigh, rubbing my temples. This isn't supposed to be so complicated.

"You're thinking about him again, aren't you?"

I turn, startled to see Dazai standing there with that infuriating grin on his face.

"Don't you have a mission or something to bother someone else with?" I ask, trying to sound irritated, but it doesn't quite come out right.

Dazai shrugs. "I'm just observing. And I'm pretty sure you're as obvious as a beacon when it comes to Akutagawa."

I roll my eyes. "There's nothing to observe. It's just—he's just—"

"Complicated?" Dazai finishes for me, his grin widening.

"Yeah," I mutter, "complicated."

He pauses, his expression growing more serious. "Atsushi, you need to realize something about him."

I glance at Dazai, confused. "What?"

"He's not like you. He doesn't trust easily, and he doesn't let people in. But you... you make him feel something he's been fighting for a long time. And that terrifies him."

My chest tightens at his words. "I don't... I don't want to scare him."

"You're already doing it, whether you know it or not," Dazai says gently. "But it's not a bad thing. You just need to be patient."

I look out at the horizon, wondering if I'll ever truly understand Akutagawa.

Akutagawa's POV

I'm sitting in the shadows of the building, the dim light from the lamp outside casting long shadows across the room.

It's late, and most of the Agency is quiet, but I can't sleep. My mind is too restless, too... alive with thoughts I can't seem to suppress.

And those thoughts always lead back to him.

Atsushi.

He's been acting strange lately, almost... patient with me, as if he's waiting for me to let my guard down. It's infuriating, but at the same time, there's a part of me that doesn't want him to stop.

I grip the edge of the table, my knuckles white.

He doesn't understand.

No one understands.

I've spent my entire life building walls, fortifying myself against the world. I can't just let him in.

But every time he looks at me, every time he speaks to me with that strange, unwavering kindness, the walls start to crumble.

I can't let him do this.

I can't let him get close.

But the more I try to push him away, the harder it becomes to stay distant.

Atsushi's POV

The next mission is nothing extraordinary, just a routine takedown of a small-time gang. But as soon as I see Akutagawa next to me, the weight of our unspoken tension makes the air feel thick.

We're silent throughout the entire mission, our movements synchronized as if we've been working together for years. But underneath it all, there's this current running between us—something charged, something that feels like it's about to snap.

We return to the Agency late, the adrenaline from the fight still buzzing in my veins.

"Another day, another mission," I mutter to myself, trying to shake off the lingering unease.

But before I can leave, I feel Akutagawa's presence behind me. I turn to find him standing there, his eyes fixed on me.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" he asks, his voice low.

I blink, surprised. "Like what?"

"Like you want something from me," he says, his gaze intense. "I'm not someone you can just... fix."

I open my mouth to respond, but the words die in my throat. Because he's right. I can't fix him. I don't even know if I want to fix him.

I just want to... be close to him.

But I can't say that.

So I just shrug, trying to play it off. "I don't want anything. I just... I just want to understand you."

His eyes flash, his lips curling into a mocking smile. "You're an idiot."

But despite the harsh words, I catch a glimpse of something in his eyes—something soft, almost vulnerable.

Before I can say anything else, he turns and walks away, leaving me standing there, unsure of what just happened.

Akutagawa's POV

I don't know why I said that.

I don't know why I even care.

Atsushi's words keep echoing in my head, and no matter how hard I try to push them away, they keep resurfacing.

I just want him to leave me alone. I want him to stop looking at me like I'm someone worth understanding.

But the truth is, part of me doesn't want him to go.

And that terrifies me.