Fractured Reflections

Chapter IX

Atsushi's POV

It's been days since I last spoke to Akutagawa. I know he's avoiding me, but there's something in the air between us that feels like it's about to snap, like everything we've been dancing around is finally coming to a head.

I've always known that Akutagawa's the kind of person who hides everything beneath layers of pride and anger, but lately, it feels like those layers are thinner, cracking at the edges. And every time I think I understand him, he pulls away, leaving me standing in the dark.

But I can't stop.

I won't stop.

I'm standing outside the Agency now, staring at the door, my heart pounding in my chest. I know he's in there, probably alone, brooding as usual. But something's different this time. I can feel it.

I'm not going to let him push me away anymore.

I walk inside, determined, but the moment I step into the hallway, I hear the familiar sound of footsteps.

Akutagawa.

I turn to see him standing at the end of the hallway, his expression unreadable, his eyes dark.

"You're here," he says, his voice cold.

I don't hesitate. "I need to talk to you."

For a moment, he doesn't move, doesn't say anything. His gaze flickers briefly, almost nervously, before he turns and starts walking away.

But I'm not letting him go this time.

I follow him, my footsteps louder now, matching the urgency in my chest.

"Akutagawa," I call out, stopping him in his tracks.

He doesn't turn around, but his body stiffens. "What do you want from me?"

I take a deep breath, feeling the weight of everything I've been holding back. "I want to understand you," I say softly. "I want to know why you're pushing me away. Why you're so afraid to let anyone in."

For a long moment, there's nothing but silence. Then, Akutagawa finally turns to face me, his expression raw, more vulnerable than I've ever seen him.

"I'm not afraid," he says, his voice barely above a whisper. "I just don't need anyone. I don't need you."

But his words are weak, strained. I can see it now—the cracks in his armor, the way he's trembling just slightly.

I take a step forward, my heart in my throat. "I know you don't want to admit it, but you do. You're not as strong as you pretend to be."

His eyes flash with anger, but there's something else in them too—something that makes my chest tighten.

"You don't know anything about me," he growls, but there's no real bite behind the words.

I reach out, my hand almost trembling, but I stop just short of touching him. "I don't need to know everything. I just need you to let me in. Let me be there for you, even if it scares you."

For a long time, he doesn't answer. I'm starting to think he'll push me away again, but then, something shifts.

Akutagawa's eyes soften, just for a second, and in that fleeting moment, I see the truth—the pain, the fear, the loneliness that he's been carrying all along.

And then, almost too quietly to hear, he whispers, "I don't know how to let you in."

My heart aches at his words, and before I can stop myself, I close the distance between us.

"I'll show you," I say, my voice steady despite the storm brewing inside me.

And for the first time, Akutagawa doesn't pull away.

He stands there, his body tense, but there's no more anger, no more walls between us. He lets me get closer, lets me see him—truly see him—for the first time.

I reach out and place my hand gently on his arm, feeling the warmth of his skin under my touch. He doesn't flinch.

"I'm here," I say softly, "And I'm not going anywhere."

For a moment, it's as if the world stops. It's just the two of us, standing there in the silence of the hallway, the weight of everything finally settling between us.

Then, to my surprise, Akutagawa takes a slow breath and steps closer.

"I don't need your pity," he mutters, his voice rough.

"I'm not pitying you," I reply, my hand still on his arm. "I'm just here."

And that's enough.

Akutagawa's POV

I don't know what's happening.

Atsushi is standing so close to me, and I should pull away, tell him to leave. But I don't.

I can't.

His words—so simple, so steady—are like a lifeline, pulling me from the abyss I've been trapped in for so long. I've spent my whole life pushing people away, pushing him away, but now... now, it feels different.

I've always been alone.

But maybe... maybe I don't have to be.

"I don't know what this is," I say quietly, my voice strained, the walls I've built around myself trembling.

"I don't know either," Atsushi replies, his hand still on my arm. "But I'm not leaving you, Akutagawa. Not this time."

And for once, I believe him.

Atsushi's POV

The silence stretches on, but this time, it's comfortable.

Akutagawa doesn't pull away. He doesn't push me out of his life. And for the first time, I feel like I'm starting to understand him—not because I've figured him out, but because we've finally broken down the walls between us.

It's not perfect.

It's not easy.

But it's real.

And maybe that's enough.