Retard Retreat

~6~

White meat, dark meat, you just can't lose
I fell off my moped and I got a bruise
Turkey in the oven and buns in the toaster
I'll never take down my Cheryl Tiegs poster
Wrap the turkey up in aluminum foil
My brother likes to masturbarte with baby oil
Turkey and sweet potato pie
Sammy Davis Jr. only had one eye

    ~ Happy thanksgiving every body

Adam Sandler's thanksgiving song, plays in the background on a speaker, in the kitchen. Daisy, and Layne are tasked with cooking the thanksgiving dinner for everyone. Usually Tess would be the one cooking but after years of doing so Tess needed a break so she gave that task to the one that is always too stoned to function, and the other being just mentally retarded when it came to cooking, and a lot of other things too.

"We can't forget the turkey in the oven... if we do this whole dinner is screwed." Layne reminded Daisy, who was working on making the mashed potatoes.

"Yeah, yeah. I got it on a timer no worries." Daisy replied between taking hits off her blunt. "I think we should just purposefully fuck this up so we don't ever have to cook again."

"Daisy, no. We were trusted with making dinner and we're gonna do this right." Layne explained while stirring the mac n cheese ingredients together. "Hey uhh, you think chocolate milk will work as a substitute for the milk?"

Daisy stopped what she was doing and turned to look at layne. Daisy had to take a deep breath as she processed what layne had just said.

"Did you say chocolate milk?" Daisy asked walking over to look at what layne was up too.

"Yeah... um I might've already added it in." Layne stated realizing they definitely fucked up; as the cheese and noodles were turning slightly brown. Daisy looked in the pot and back up at Layne and just shook her head in disbelief.

"Layne what the fuck? That was the rest of the Kraft we had. How are we supposed to fix this?"

"I mean it's probably still edible."

"Would you want to eat that?" Daisy asked pointing at the pot of Mac n cheese.

"No."

"Then why would anyone else want to eat that?" Daisy asked taking a hit off her blunt to calm her stressed out mind.

"I don't know, but we can't just not have Mac n cheese for the dinner..."

"Fine continue making it. But no one's actually gonna eat it." Daisy said shaking her head as she walked back over to where she was working on the mashed potatoes.

"Out of spite I'm gonna make sure to at least finish a bowl of it."

"I will literally bet money you take one bite and spit it out."

"Fine let's bet on it. Twenty dollars says I'll eat a bowl of chocolate Mac n cheese."

"Your on." Daisy replied, and they both continued to finish making the dinner. "Hey you used that special butter I lended you right?"

"Yeah, don't worry I used your marijuana butter. I wouldn't forget it. Plus pretty sure the only way anyone would be able to eat this Mac n cheese is if they're high off their ass." Layne explained while putting the Mac n cheese in some Tupperware, before going to check on the turkey.

"Good, good. Trust me no one is gonna eat that no matter how fucked up they are." Daisy replied.

"Yeah, we'll see about that. I got a feeling at least one person is gonna enjoy it. Other than me of course."

As the two continued cooking, eventually Tess walked into the kitchen, shocked to be able to smell turkey cooking. She thought the whole house would've burned down by now.