The Demon's Apprentice || Rewrite

Disappointment

"Before we continue... with your training, I have... something different in mind. We're not... going to practice any techniques or forms now." Kokushibo began, his voice calm and composed, and placing a hand on Tanjirou's shoulder. He could see that the boy was still shaken by the encounter with Douma.

Tanjirou blinked again, this time in surprise. Either it was from the unusual act of reassurance from Kokushibo or from the words, or perhaps both.

"No forms or techniques today." Kokushibo repeated, his voice still calm. "You're still... shaken from the encounter... with Douma earlier. I don't want to... push you too hard and risk further distress... We'll be doing something different."

Tanjirou perked up. "No need for that, sensei. I'll be fine." Tanjirou said. "I'm the eldest."

The last part came out a bit too quickly, as if said automatically.

A brief memory of his human life flashed in Kokushibo's mind. He was the also the eldest child in the family, and as a result was expected more than his younger twin. Yoriichi was expected to stay out of the way and be out of the house by the time he turned ten, while he was expected to learn complicated swordmanship techniques at the age of seven with zero mistakes.

But while he was expected to be strong as the eldest, Tanjirou expects himself to be.

The reason for Tanjirou's mindset isn't fully clear, but Kokushibo can piece up a pretty good guess. Back when Kokushibo first encountered Tanjirou, the boy was traveling with his demon sister. What most likely happened is that their family was attacked, Tanjirou's sister surviving as a demon. Due to this, Tanjirou must feel some sort of guilt over it, and tries to be as strong as he can to protect his sister.

Now Tanjirou doesn't remember the past, but the habit still remains. The original reason to keep getting stronger was now gone, and Tanjirou doesn't even remember it. It's sad, really.

And it is important to remember that Tanjirou, while not a small child, is still a teenager - a child.

Kokushibo thought for a moment, silently contemplating the situation. He knew he couldn't force Tanjirou to change his mindset, but perhaps there's another way to approach the issue...

Kokushibo paused for a moment before phrasing his next wordscarefully. "Why do you... think you have to be... strong?"

Tanjirou blinked again, and looked as if the answer was the most obvious thing. "W-well, if I understood correctly, you're the strongest demon after the Lord, so since I'm your student, I feel like I should at least meet some sort of expectations."

Ah, the boy didn't want anyone, espechially Kokushibo, to think of him as a waste of time.

Kokushibo listened to Tanjirou's answer, his expression remaining stoic, but internally, he was somewhat taken aback by the boy's reasoning.

"You think... you have to be strong... because I'm your teacher... and you don't want to disappoint me?" Kokushibo summarized, unable to hide his slight surprise.

Kokushibo hadn't expected that to be the main reason Tanjirou pushed himself so hard.

Tanjirou looked at the floor and nodded.

Kokushibo observed Tanjirou's response, noting his body language - the way he averted his gaze towards the floor.

He sighed internally, realizing the depth of the problem. Tanjiro's motivation went beyond just wanting to meet expectations. It was more about not disappointing the person he looked up to.

Michikatsu isn't sure how he feels about that.

"Tanjirou." Kokushibo started, his tone surprisingly gentle. "Do you think... I would be disappointed in you... if you weren't as strong as me?"