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unwind with - Jeene Bhi De by Harish Sagane, Yaseer Desai
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I stood there, frozen. The energy, liveliness I sensed here, the fresh air dexterously homogenized in the pleasantly musty smell of soil I wore that was sucked by monstrous flames of fire. The smoke swirls around me, thick and suffocating, clinging to my clothes, my skin, my thoughts. The flames that once was kissing the sky now reduced to embers, glowing weakly in the darkness. But it's the cries that I couldn't escape even when I wanted to shut everything and everyone but I felt heavy even to lift my hands. This sight of life I was never experienced. The screams, shouts was cutting through the air, sharp and raw and each one like a knife to my heart. People were screaming, wailing, some in disbelief, others in frantic desperation. Their voices rise and fall, a chorus of agony that echoed in the pit of my stomach.
Bujima. That day too fire were so grotesque that unit of fire extinguisher failed to control and I lost my brother and my uncle in that. I don't know why and how but I was suddenly found myself beholding my Bujima, Maa, Baba and all Bansal's screaming, crying in agony but I was not able to console them. Maa was calling me over and over, she was trying to reach me but I didn't move. She needed me, she was wailing for me but I was not able to shift myself. I was numb, felt like my feet's were glued to ground. There cry's slowly started encircling around me, I was trying desperately to clutch my ear until it bleeds and I become deaf cause there wails promptly choking me but my hands grasped by their accusation and they were continuously reminding me that I was the reason. Because of me, Uttu bhai and Mahesh Fufaji was not with us, I killed them.
No, No, I didn't kill them. I didn't. It was happening again. My chest tightens and suddenly I blanked out that I was not able to breath. I could hear my heart hammering in ribs, too fast, too loud. I could felt something creeping up my spine, like an electric shock that starts small and spreads. Why I suddenly felt to hard to breathe? Why just I can't breathe normally? I tried to focus on my breathing, I tried to steadied it but I was failing it miserably. My hands were shaking vigorously, my fingers were numb. I felt something stuck in throat, suffocating me. I was going to die, I was not able to breathe. I needed breathe. My hands were ice-cold, and I could felt the sweat running down my back. My body's shaking, but I couldn't't stop it. The world spins, a dizzying blur of shapes and colors.
