Hot tears fall from my eyes. I used to feel alright. Now I just feel lost. I can't quite grasp what it is. My friends don't treat me like they used to. My family thinks I am insane. I am the ugly duckling. And I am so sick of it. I am broken and when someone tries to fix me, I fall apart again. I can't be fixed. No matter who tries. I sit on the toilet of the school bathroom and allow myself to dwell in self pity. Three minutes later, the bell rings and I am forced to go to class. I step into the musky room. I take my usual seat in the back by the window (where I sit in every class). I watch Zach walk into the class room. We make quick eye contact. And I am the one to break it. I can feel his eyes linger on me. I shift in my seat and he gets pulled into his own seat by his football friends. I can tell he still cares. I know that he still cares about me. I just want to hear him say it to my face. Class starts and I start to zone out. I stare out the window and imagine a life where I am happy. I still have my friends and my family understand. I wish I could live like that. But maybe I was just made to be sad. Maybe I was not made to be fixed. Maybe I was made to be broken. I will just have learn to accept that. Class ends and I take my time to pack up my stuff. I look up to see Zach standing in front of me.
"Hey Luna." I don't know what to do.
"Oh, um, hey Zachary."
"Do you-" he takes a sharp inhale. "Do you want to go get lunch? I know this really nifty sandwich shop if you want to go."
I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear. "Sure. That sounds fun."
"Well pack up you stuff and let's go." He winked at me and a small smile appeared on my lips.
We arrived at the the sandwich shop and Zach jogged over to my door and opened it for me. I quietly thanked him and we entered the shop. We both ordered and fought for who payed. He ended up winning. We grabbed our sandwiches and found a table.
"So Luna, how have you been?"
"Good. I have been really good."
He did not seemed to convinced. "Oh, that's good."
"What about you? Have you talked to Gordon lately?"
"I have been good. And no. I haven't talked to him in a few years. We had a fight. He was talking crap about you and I couldn't take it. So I kicked him out and told him to never talk to me
again."
"Oh. Well thanks for defending me. People don't really do that."
"Of course, beautiful."
After years of being friends but not, this was really happening. We are talking. We are getting our friendship back. I just don't know if he will stay once he finds out about the real me.
