Friday, October 12
Kyle's POV
"I don't have all day, okay? I have places to be." Joe really knows how to take up a person's time.
"Kyle, this is a big step. And you may call it nothing but it's something. It's progress."
I roll my eyes at Joe and mentally choke him. Choking him would be so much fun, not to sound all weird and dark but I can picture myself enjoying it. Don't judge. "Progress my ass."
"Kyle, you need to understand something. You can't keep your thoughts and emotions bottled up, alright? It just isn't healthy for you- or for anyone. I need you to talk to me, to really talk to me. I can't do anything for you if you don't talk."
"I do talk," I say. I talk about my true feelings every once in a while. I just feel like when I do show my true feelings or talk about my feelings in general somehow my life falls down into a dark, deadly abyss and it's no fun. I can't keep risking that and if avoiding my feelings helps me avoid the abyss... well then no one will ever know how I feel.
"You talk without actually saying anything. Now I'm going to ask you a very cliche therapist question but how does Imogen make you feel?"
Imogen.
Imogen Johns makes me feel like... like crap. She makes me crazy but at the same time she makes me feel good and different. And I sound like a total girl. "She makes me feel like a warm bowl of biscuits. Okay? That's it."
Joe stares at me for a while before speaking. "You like her."
Me? Liking someone? I don't think so. I don't like her. I like her company and stuff but in reality I just want her. I want her to be around in my life and don't mind her being around but that doesn't mean I like her. If that even makes any sense. "I don't like her, I just... want her." There's a huge difference.
"Okay, Kyle. This week I want you to spend some time with Imogen and-"
My phone starts ringing before he can finish. I mentally thank whoever's calling and answer.
"Hello?"
"Yes, Imogen. What do you need?"
"Well, where are you?" She sounds nervous and somewhat upset. "I really want to talk to you. Why have you been avoiding me?"
Joe mouths for me to put it on speaker or hang up 'cause really I'm not supposed to be having a phone call during a session. So I put it on speaker. "I haven't been avoiding you, Imogen. I just have... things to do right now. I'll be home soon."
"Okay, um, Jaxon wants to talk to you so... bye."
There's some shuffling and then I hear that idiots voice. "Hey, Kylie."
"Do not call me that," I snap. He only laughs.
"Dude, Wyatt got some-"
"Yeah, let's not talk about that right now, okay? I have to go." I hang up the phone and shove it in my pocket. Joe scribbles down some things in his notebook and frowns.
"That night when you came to my house you mentioned that you said something to Imogen when you were drunk. But when did you start drinking again?"
"It was just one party and I don't plan on doing it again. I promise, does that make it better?"
"No, I think you need to stay away from Jaxon because he's clearly offering you marijuana."
"I can't stay away from him. Every hour of everyday Jaxon is with me or with Imogen."
