Weeping Beeswax

Steamy

The rat’s been sleeping on my back for a while now.  How long do rats sleep?  I guess it doesn’t matter, my sense of time is too skewed to properly tell if its been too long. All I know is that I left the valley of rats a good while ago, hardly visible on the horizon, not that I can see the horizon anyway.  But it must have been a while for something as slow as me to move that far.  Of course, I’ve tried to wake it up, but every time I do, it just bites me and goes back to sleep.  Rude.

But… it’s kind of nice.  I can feel its little heartbeat against my own.  Wait no, that's not my heart.  Who’s heart is that- oh right!  I found that frozen heart a while back, completely forgot about that!  I still don’t know why that was there.  Hmm, I remember seeing... Something.  But for the life of me, I can’t remember what I saw!  I know it was something strange, but that's it. 

Was it a dream?  A hallucination?  It doesn’t matter really.  I see weird shit all the time, honestly, I don’t trust my brain at all, I have no way of knowing what is and what isn’t real  I wonder if this rat is real?  It seems too good to be true honestly. 

Yeah, look at it!  It’s so small and weak.  Sleeping on me, snuggling its little head against the moss.  It’s so sweet.  Sure it’s kind of mean, but that’s ok.  It’s nothing short of a miracle it decided to get near me, let alone touch me at all.  None of the other rats had the guts.  I’m a pathetic creature, aren’t I?  I’m honored to have the acceptance of s diseased infant rat!  I remember a time I thought them so lowly, I didn’t dare think about eating them, even in the face of starvation!  God I’ve fallen from grace, I miss being worthy of dignity, now I’m nothing but a moldy slimy ugly dirty thing.   I don't deserve to be in this rat’s presence.

Wait!  I see something glowing!  No, I see lots of things glowing!  Warm red glow!  Contrasting with blacks browns and, rusty reds!  I even see some yellow!  This place is so pretty!  At least compared to the rest of the complex.  It’s usually grey, sometimes dull cold blue.  Empty, big, endless.  But this place is different!  I think I see…  damn what was the word?  I see Machines, large tubes, with little doors that look like cages, from those doors, it glows, glows with fire.  There is heavy fog around here.  Also no water on the ground, odd. 

Woah, so I hear a- a um… Fuck I keep forgetting words!  OK, so think of another machine, also a tube, but this time horizontal.  And also really really long.  Well, only the front is a tube, the size of a small house, with a tube on the top.  It has wheels, and carries a lot of giant boxes, that follow behind, and also have wheels.  They make that one noise, how do I describe it?  Uhh… Oh, I remember!  They went like- choo choo.  That sounds stupid, that onomatopoeia is for babies.   Why the hell do I remember the word onomatopoeia but not the name of the machine?  Anyway-  The sound I heard is more like, one long “Choo”  like “Choooooo”-man this is dumb. 

“SQUEAK!!!!”  The machine “Choooos” right on top of us, blasting us with condensed fog.  No wait, not fog, steam!  Boiling steam!  The poor rat screams in agony as it’s blasted with the blistering gas!  I need to save it!  Get off!

I shake my wobbly body until it falls off, but it just screams louder as it burns its paws on the sizzling floor. No!  It’s going to die!   It’s so small and weak, this is all my fault!  I’m so sorry!  I ruin everything!  First I drank its mother’s blood, then basically kidnapped it, and now this!

Oh for fucks sake I can’t wallow in my own self-pity!  I have to save it! Umm…  Maybe my slime will cool it down.  I’m so sorry!  I know it’s gross but please!  I can’t allow you to be in pain!  Get soaked in it… uhh.  Actually, just get under me!  Yeah!  I’m just going to get on top of you ok?  I know I know I know, just calm down.  Is it still too hot?