#Wattys2015 The Ghost of James Fitzpatrick

Chapter 28

Sarah did go to school. She begrudgingly showered, nibbled on her toaster waffle, climbed aboard the school bus with her brother and made the obligatory trek into Arden High School's main hall.

She listened to Mr. Hollister explain the points of the Pre Calc test, for which she had chosen not to study, then excused herself and left he classroom. She knew her parents were going to murder her, but the pull of James, alone in her bedroom at home was more than she could bear.

She had been less than truthful with him and she had come to the awful realization that keeping the secret of discovering his mother, was not worth keeping her with him. Sarah was many things, but selfish was not one of them. It was simply too high a price to pay for his company. She cared enough for him...no, she rephrased in her mind as she walked back home, she loved him enough to let him go forth and be where he was supposed to be, and go where he was supposed to go, even though it would be without her.

He had trusted her, and she was worthy of that trust. Her need to tell him was now infinitely more important than anything she could see in front of her trivial and routine day at Arden High.

Sarah stepped into her bedroom and found James sitting against the wall reading. She startled him this time and he set the book down and rose quickly to his feet when she stepped in.

"I haven't been fully truthful with you James," said Sarah, but James just looked at her without speaking.

"I spoke with your mother two nights ago, and even your brother Tom. They live in Little Rock." James remained silent and stared at her.

"I was afraid that if I told you, or I should say...once I tell you..."

"You don't have to say it Sarah, I know," interrupted James.

"I'm sorry," said Sarah, and James stepped up to hug her. He had spent so much time having the same thoughts. Now that Sarah had fulfilled his wish, his time with her would be over, he just did not know when. He knew he had to let her get back to her studies, her SAT tests, her family, her friends, her church, her life.

Once again, James was not fearful of the unknown, mostly unsettled by it. He had never anticipated wanting so badly to stay here. Going away may be God's plan, but not the plan of James Fitzpatrick. He had not planned on this kind of pain, the pain of love. He had never known this sort of pain.

Sarah's hair was long down her back and soft on his hands and wrists. James had kissed girls before, even a couple of the prettiest girls at Arden High, but he had never felt the uncertainty he did now, and he may have been able to avoid it all together if Sarah had not looked up at him, so he decided right then to kiss her softly and Sarah kissed him back. He was sure of it. She awkwardly pulled off her glasses, but James took them out of her hand and smiled as he put them back on her face.

"I want to see you Sarah, exactly as you are," and he had to make himself stop smiling to kiss her again, and if Heaven were anything like this brief moment in time, he would be one happy guy.

************

James took the pillows from Sarah's bed and put them on the floor at the foot of her bed. Sarah watched him as he situated a makeshift couch made of pillows facing out her window. He sat down on the floor and patted the space next to him, inviting Sarah to sit.

His presence felt so temporary to her now, and she wanted to stay here forever. Their view was that of the late morning sky from her window, and the tips of the bare branches of the oak tree in front of the house.

Sarah had only kissed two boys before. The first time was with Eddy Miller at a birthday party during a kissing game when she was in seventh grade and no offense to Eddy, it was so awful and mushy, it was a miracle she ever kissed anyone after that. James kisses were perfect and soft, his embrace was strong, and how anyone could master both at the same time was anyone's guess.

Sarah had sifted through a hundred songs from James' high school days, and had made him an iTunes folder she dubbed 'JRF's Monster Hits of the '70's' and she had stashed some of his favorites he had shared with her. Currently playing was none other than Bob Seger's 'We've Got Tonight', which created an aptly and depressingly perfect soundtrack for them as Sarah sat and rested her head on James' shoulder. Here they would stay until the first star of the evening sky would show itself.

Sarah promised herself, no matter how comfortable and at peace she felt, she would not fall asleep. She did not share this thought with James, but she knew if he were gone when she awoke, she would not see him again.

:,^