I was awoken by the smell of breakfast food. I noticed Ronnie wasn't beside me and blood stained my legs, it scared the fuck outta me but I remembered reading how when a virgin loses her virginity they bleed so I just got a wash cloth from his bathroom and freshen up a bit I put on one of his oversized t-shirts and went down stairs
"Hey you're up." He exclaimed putting two plates down and kissing my forhead
"Yes" I said Walking over to the table and sitting down I picked up my fork and fiddled with my eggs
"So what you wanna do now does this lead to Marriage or dating?"
"Wh-what?"
"That is what you wanted to do right that's why you wanted me to take your virginity and yeah this is what I kinda always wanted I mean we've known each other for all of our lives and-
"Ronnie I'm dying" I interrupted
"Wh-what?"
"I have Leukemia....I have less than a year to live"
"But - But Last night you & me and we and it's just"
"I wanted to feel sex, I want to feel it before I die. I have a Fuck-It List, and the first thing was to actually have sex. But you've given me something much more than that: You gave me love, passionate love."
"But you can't die I need you I just can't" he said his voice cracking, with his eye's glossy
"I know Ronnie, and I feel like I should have told you or never done it but I've had feelings for you and felt like you should be the one taking my virginity " I said
"So what is this Fuck-It List you gonna be a hoe until you die?" I gasped
"Don't say that it's filling all my sexual desires before I die! I've been a saint my whole life Ronnie, and for once I want to feel.....Pleasure! I said I was wrong for not telling you but I'm not gonna apologize, because you should understand where I'm coming from. I didn't want a big scene like this to be open I don't want to waist my time arguing, or being mad. I want to be free! And Free Is What Im Gonna Be"
It was an uneasy silence he was just leaning on the counter contemplating on what I don't know but I wish I did I walked up to him and broke the silence
" I love you Ronnie & If I survive we could be a thing but right now I wanna live something I never actually done before I came to you for sex and you gave me love"
He still looked away from me I took his face and made him kiss me
"Please don't leave me"I said hugging his neck tears actually falling I felt his arm come up on my back
"I'd never leave you and I'm with you all the way.....if it involves men I'd rather it be me than a whole bunch of other different men"
I still had my head down he picked it up with his finger under my chin
"I love you" he said and wiped my tears I nodded then he kissed me
Ronnie In I:M
