Sit Softly On Your Shoulder

Chapter 21: Affectionate Love

Wednesday comes around faster than Wei Ying expects, faster than any Wednesday in the history of past Wednesdays has any right to. And he'd be fine with that, honestly, he would...except for that teenie tiny unforgettable fact that Wen Qing is coming to see Lan Zhan tonight, in the late afternoon, at five o'clock to be specific, and the man in question has no idea about it.

The fault lies primarily at Wei Ying's feet, right on his metaphorical doorstep, and he's well aware of it.

Was that conversation only five days ago? And how is time passing by so quickly?

Wei Ying has been busy, that's the truth. After talking to the most important people in his life, including A-Yuan, he's thought long and hard about what he wants. And what he wants is for his courting gifts to be meaningful in the way that Mianmian suggested they should be, that whatever he chooses should be with care and not necessarily expensive - in fact, the monetary value should be irrelevant. So Wei Ying has been working on three very special projects.

Keeping them a secret and working on them in his own time has been a separate challenge, one he's sacrificed sleeping for, and more time spent with Lan Zhan, but he's justified it in his head. As long as he's doing it for Lan Zhan, that makes it alright. He's nearly finished with them too, and that part is the true miracle.

Every day while at the shop, he's been working on one of the gifts secretly, and it makes him giddy with nerves and joy to be doing it right under Lan Zhan's nose. Lan Zhan hardly ever pays attention to Wei Ying's hands on the sewing machine, choosing to listen to him chattering on about this and that, or whenever he looks at Wei Ying, it's an intense concentration on his face over any other body part which works out in Wei Ying's favour. The other two gifts are worked on after Wei Ying has put A-Yuan to bed and seen Lan Zhan off.

Lan Zhan hasn't voiced his request for Wei Ying to move in with him again, and Wei Ying is simultaneously relieved and disappointed by its absence.

If Lan Zhan were to ask him again, he knows he would agree in a heartbeat, but then he wouldn't be able to finish making his presents, so really, it's a vicious circle of wanting things he can't have immediately. But at the same time, Wei Ying knows, or he can guess why Lan Zhan hasn't brought up the subject of Wei Ying's residence again. Lan Zhan has always been traumatised by his parents' breakup, the way they loved each other appearing unbalanced in a way, stronger from his father's side than his mother, and the evidence of his mother's ambivalence being the premises where they're currently spending their daylight hours. The truth of his mother's growth and happiness sprouting and thriving, away from their family unit, has brought Lan Zhan the understanding that to love someone means giving them the freedom to choose their own steps. That holding that person close can be achieved too, through a fearless determination not to make them a prisoner of one's own dreams.

Which brings him back to today.

"Wei Ying?"

Lan Zhan sounds closer, and as Wei Ying startles himself into the present, he hears the echoing sound of the little silver bell over the door of the shop, signalling the leaving of another customer. They're finally alone now.

He smiles at Lan Zhan, because that's his default mode. Everything is better by smiling.

Lan Zhan takes his hands, squeezing them gently. He looks worried. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah? Why?" Wei Ying winces internally at the forced brightness in his tone.

Lan Zhan winces externally. "You've been distracted...lately. Are you sleeping well?"

Wei Ying chews on his bottom lip, thinking fast on how to avoid answering. He can't admit to any of that because of obvious reasons but it DOES give him an opening about tonight. This time, his smile is more genuine, and reassures Lan Zhan that he's at least partially alright. Those strong, dependable shoulders lower a little as some of the tension seeps away from Lan Zhan.