Sorry, Not Sorry (Old version)

- 43

We leave the city the next day, driving down a pretty uneventful road for the entirety of the drive, eventually stopping at a motel off the side of the highway. When we get into the room, Max goes straight into the shower. I kneel down in front of my bag, my eyes heavy and my limbs aching. I can't wait to be back in my own bed. As my bag slides slightly along the floor, I don't hear the familiar rattle from in the bag. I freeze for a second, before digging more urgently through the suitcase. Its not here. I glance around, pulling the suitcase up to check behind it. I pull open the kitchen draws, the forks, knives and spoons clanging against each other with an ascruciating noise. The water in the shower cuts off as I kneel down and fling open the cupboard doors. I check the fridge, stopping briefly to take a sip of the freezing water, looking around the hotel room as I throw the bottle back in.

Max emerges from the bathroom, a loose T-shirt hanging from his shoulders. I have no time to admire though, as I glance back away, dropping on my knees to check my bag again. "Dang, I needed that shower." He sighs, stretching his back. "My body still feels sticky from the beach air." He's quiet for a second, watching me as I wildly dig through the bags. I slam it shut again, standing and walking over to the two tiny bedside tables. I tug the drawer open. "Are you okay, Xay?" Max asks.

"Oh, I'm totally fine. Don't worry about it." I claim, hoping quietly that my voice is steady. I throw aside the small book from the drawer. Ugh, why'd I even look here. The draws too small, anyway. I'm wasting time. Max steps closer, holding his phone in his hand.

"Hey, no your not." He says, "What's missing?"

"I'm fine." I say, louder.

"Xavier? What-"

"I'm okay!" I yell, slamming the small drawer shut, "It's fine! I can survive!"

"Xay, sit down." Max says, sitting down on the bed and extending a hand for me to grab. "What's wrong?"

"It's fine." I say, ignoring his demand and swatting  away his hand. "Nothings missing. It's probably just in the car."

He nods, "Okay, then let's go check."

I rush out the door, figeting with the hem of my sleeve as Max unlocks the car. I climb in the passenger seat, looking in all the pockets and the ones on the drivers side, too. Max stands next to the open door as I look around, bending over to a check under the seats, on the floor. "It's not here." I state, biting my thumbnail.

"What's not here?" Max asks, leaning on the door as I bury my face in my hands. I let out a small groan. I promised  her I wouldn't lose them. "Xay, what's not here? I can't help you if I don't know."

"I don't want your help!" I snap, pulling my hands away from my face. "Sorry." I add, "I'm being a bother."

"No your not."

"Tell that to that guy over there." I say, pointing weakly to a man satndin outside of his room with a cigarette between his fingers, clearly wondering what the ruckus is all about. Max scowls at him, and the guy dissapears into his room with a grunt.

"Looks like he doesn't want to talk." Max says, leaning closer. "Xavier, it's okay. I want to help you. Let me help you."

"I'm sorry. I told mum I wouldn't lose them." I sniffle, cold tears resting on my cheeks.

"Lose them? Your meds." Max says, thinking. "Could I buy more for you? Is that possible?" He pulls out his phone and starts pacing, googling something.

"Max, where could they be?" I ask, my voice quiet. "I searched the whole room."

"Let's check again." He says, going back through the door. I follow him, slamming the car door a bit to hard, wincing at the sound. When I get into the room, Max is looking through all the shelves and cupboards I've already checked.