My Moon: An Enjolras Love Story

i love him but only on my own

SÉRAPHINE POV

I was admittedly quite surprised with myself for developing feelings for Enjolras so quickly. I had just met him only a few short days prior, and I did not understand why I was enchanted by him so immediately. He very clearly was an alluring and captivating person who drew everyone in; nobody could deny his character and charisma. But developing romantic feelings was different than simply being compelled to his presence. It had been quite some time since I had a crush on anyone, and I met the sensation with mixed feelings. On the one hand, I was anxious. I wanted to continue to be Enjolras's friend despite the feelings I felt myself growing for him. However, I was excited -- having crushes certainly makes life fun, I have found.

Either way, I told myself not to fall too deep for him. For the time being, it was just a crush, and I hoped it would not develop into anything stronger. It would be hard to keep him as a companion if I were in love with him and he only viewed me as a friend. I decided not to worry about that yet because I knew that, at the moment, it was not love.

"So you agree with me that France is corrupt under this king's rule and something needs to be done, Séraphine?"

Oh, dear. Enjolras had been telling me his feelings about the government, and I had been silently nodding despite the fact that my head was in a completely different place. I did agree with him that France had become corrupt, but it was simply too hard not to focus on my epiphany -- that I had started to view him as more than a friend. I pushed my new romantic feelings out of my head and put in my two cents.

"I agree. The poor are growing in numbers and the middle class is not doing anything to help them."

"You say this," said Enjolras with a small smirk, "even though you are a member of the middle class."

"As are you," I retorted. "I do my share of helping out the poor. I frequently bake cakes and pastries and distribute them to the less fortunate."

"How kind of you," Enjolras stated earnestly. "The middle class needs more kind people like you."

I felt my cheeks getting hotter and I hoped the blush on my face was not too visible. Lord, why did Enjolras have to be so charming?

"It needs more people like you, too," I replied. "Idealists. Dreamers."

"You strike me as an idealist and a dreamer yourself," he noticed.

"I consider myself so. I've always been a bit too optimistic for my own good."

"That doesn't quite sound like a bad thing," Enjolras stated, half-smiling.

"Sometimes it is," I sighed. "I get my hopes up and my expectations get too high. And then that makes it all the more disappointing when they aren't seen through."

"Well, I'm sorry to hear that," he said. Abruptly, he added, "Hey, are you finished with your meal? I apologize for rushing you, but today is Friday and I have to get going to class soon."