We all have secrets // shawn mendes

So we meet again

It was the next day , right after the whole scenario that had happened between me and Lauryn , I couldn't help myself but feel confused .

Was it true ? Do I really have a twin sister ? Did I really kill Lauryn's parents ? Am I really a murderer ?

There were thousands of questions going through my mind , but all of the questions will still remain unanswered .

I kept convincing myself that everything Lauryn said was not true , because honestly I really needed to convince myself and not make myself feel stressed .

This is what Lauryn wanted , she wants me to suffer , she wants me to feel bad , and I am not giving way to live up to that satisfaction .

I just want the truth , I need the truth .

Just then , my phone started to ring .

* It started playing swap it out by Justin Bieber * since that was my ringtone .

I grabbed my phone to find out who is calling , and it turns out to be Joey .

Oh my god , I just remembered that I never got back to the party since Lauryn kidnapped me .

I decided to answer my phone , I didn't want to at first cause I just wanted to figure some things out .

* Phone conversation *

Joey : YOU ANSWERED THANK GOD , LAUREN WHAT IN THE WORLD HAPPENED ?

"Hey Joey , I am so sorry , nothing really happened I just wasn't really feeling that party"

Joey : You don't have to be sorry , I understand . I just really wanted you to have fun , and I was really worried , I'm so glad you're okay .

"I did have fun for awhile , and I am so sorry , awwwww you're so sweet Joey , thank you so much for everything"

Joey : I really hope you're okay Lauren , I am always here if you need someone to talk to , I just want you to know that I'll always be here for you .

Just when Joey said " I am always here if you need someone to talk to " I felt streams of tears running down my cheeks , I wanted to talk to Joey and tell him everything about what has happened recently but I can't , I just can't , Lauryn told me not to tell anyone , but I really do have to tell someone , I just can't keep it all inside . I miss those days , when I used to tell Joey literally everything about my life and now I just feel like I don't share anything with Joey anymore and I feel like we have lost "that" connection we had , and I'm pretty sure he knows that too .

" Thank you so much Joey , I love you so much"

Joey : You're welcome Lauren I love you too , do you wanna hangout ?

" I would love to but I can't right now , but thank you so much for calling me "

Joey : Okay no worries , goodbye then I'll see you in school"

"Byeeeeeeee"

*Phone conversation ends*

Okay what even , school is starting tomorrow ? I totally forgot about school . Wow this is just great .

I decided to lay on my bed and think about life , out of a sudden my heart started pounding and I wasn't able to breathe .

I think I'm having a panic attack , I freaked , my hands started getting sweaty , but I just remembered that I had medication .

I ran to my bathroom and I took some pills and drank water , and I started breathing normally again.

This happens quite a lot , I suffer from anxiety , this has happen very frequently now so I'm used to it .