A Redneck's Wicked Game (A Daryl Dixon Story)

Scars & Secrets

Chapter 17--Scars & Secrets

Daryl's POV

We've been back from the run for a couple of hours. We met with the rest of the group and discussed the encounter with Sam and his men. Rick agrees with Rowan much to my relief. The girl has a good head on her shoulders and once again I think she's right about preparing for the worst, just in case. You can't trust people these days, even if you knew them before everything went to hell. People have to earn trust and everyone I'm with has proved that to me ten-fold especially Rowan.

I wander up to our room and find a cardboard shoebox in the loft. I carry it over to the table opening it up. I fish the piece of silky green lingerie out of the bottom of my bag; I've been carrying it around ever since we made that run to Walmart on our way up here. I put it in the box before reaching into my pocket and pulling out a silver chain. I look at the necklace that's wrapped around my knuckles before putting it in the box. It's nothing expensive but when I saw it in the display case at the hardware store it made me think of her. Dangling on the silver chain is a small silver squirrel charm and I smile as I lay it on top of the green teddy. I know it ain't much but at least she'll have something to open for her birthday. I know how it is not to celebrate holidays and if I can give her just one reason to smile on her birthday, it will be worth it. I put the lid on the shoebox and set it down on her side of the bed; she'll find it eventually. I walk back down to the kitchen, hoping dinner is just about done; I'm starving.

I find Rowan in the kitchen talking with Maggie and Carol as the three of them put together dinner. I peer into the large cast-iron pot on the stove as Rowan stirs it. She grins at me, "Hungry for squirrel stew Daryl?" I grunt, "Looks good." Maggie laughs, "He's such a talker." Rowan chuckles, "It's fine, I prefer the strong silent type." Carol and Maggie giggle and go back to chopping some of the wild garlic Rowan collected at her uncle's place. I lean over to Rowan's ear softly whispering, "I prefer a screamer." She blushes at my innuendo and nudges me with her hip as she whispers back, "Yer so bad, ya know that?" I give her a smirk and nod as I walk away to take a seat at the table.

Carol gets up to make biscuits for the stew and I sharpen my hunting knife as I listen to the banter between the three women. Rowan talks a little but as usual, she mostly just listens to the other two. I may not join into conversations most of the time but I do enjoy listening to everyone else as they talk. Rowan sits down next to me and hands me her hunting knife, "Could you sharpen mine too?" I nod as she sets the knife on the table in front of me. She gives me a small smile as she gets back up, "Thanks."

Soon dinner is being served and everyone arrives in the kitchen. Rowan sits down next to me as she hands me a bowl of stew. I nod a thank you as I pick up my spoon to start eating. Sasha hands me a biscuit and I mumble, "Thanks." I take the first bite of the squirrel stew and I can't help but crack a smile. I look over at Rowan, "Damn woman this is the best dang squirrel stew I've ever had." She blushes a little and shrugs, "It's okay, I guess. Glad ya like it though." I nudge her and whisper, "Git used to it princess, I like yer cookin'." She smiles a little and digs into her own bowl, fidgeting a little as everyone compliments her cooking. Under the table I rest my hand on her thigh to make her calmer; I know that she hates being the center of attention. I feel her relax a little under my touch but I keep my hand there throughout the meal.

After dinner we go outside for a smoke and I watch her as she sits on a log not too far from the mill door. She's staring out into the dim evening sky, lost in her thoughts. I light my cigarette as I keep an eye on her. She's been extremely quiet since we got back and I wonder what's going on through her mind. I don't like prying but she's starting to worry me a little. I see her rub her right thigh as she stares out across the meadow and I shake my head in apprehension; I know she tends to rub her scars when she thinks about her past. I walk over to her, sitting down to her right. She doesn't even notice my presence; she's so lost in her thoughts. I watch her rub her thigh harder as her lips tighten and I reach out to still her hand by placing my hand on top. She flinches a little and looks up at me, finally realizing I'm next to her. She looks down at my hand over hers and lets out a deep breath. I sigh, "What's going through yer head Rowan?" She shrugs, "Nothing." I grunt, "I don't believe ya." She looks into my eyes and I see fear behind her pretty green eyes. I squeeze her hand a little as I softly ask, "Come on Rowan, I know ya better than that." She sighs, "Just thinking about my past; nothing I can change." I nod, "I figured as much." She looks confused, "How did ya know?" I look down at her right thigh and mutter, "Ya always rub yer scars when ya think about yer past." She flashes an embarrassed look, adverting her eyes to the ground. I entwine my hand in hers as I say, "It's fine Rowan, I ain't gonna tell anyone." She nods, "I know; I just didn't think I could be read so easily." I chuckle, "Did ya forget princess? It's what I do best." She rolls her eyes, "So damn modest, Dixon." I shrug and crack a little smile at her.

She sighs and I take the opportunity to ask, "Did yer Ma make all those scars?" She's quiet for a moment and I wonder if I went too far but she answers, "Most of them, I did a few myself at one point." I sigh, "Why?" She picks up her hand still entwined with mine as she says, "The same reason you did this one to yerself." I look at my hand as she holds it up; noticing you can still clearly see the burn mark between my thumb and forefinger. I look in her eyes and mumble, "How did ya know?" She gives me a meek look as she quietly admits, "I saw ya do it Daryl." I'm stunned, she's never mentioned it before and I ask, "You were there?" She nods, "Yeah I was in the tree when ya walked up the path to the clearing. I watched ya for a while, seeing what you were up to. Once ya did that I decided to leave." I feel uneasy knowing that she probably saw everything, including me crying but I ask, "Why leave?" She lets out a deep breath and gently says, "We all grieve in different ways Daryl; that was yers. It wasn't meant for anyone else to see, so I left ya alone." I nod and she whispers, "It about broke my heart though." I look at her surprised, "Why? Ya didn't know me." She shrugs as she whispers, "It takes a lot for someone like us to break down and show emotion. I knew ya were hurting and there was nothing I could do." She lights another cigarette and looks away; signaling that she's done talking about this. I give her hand a squeeze before releasing it as I tell her, "If ya want to talk, I'll always listen Rowan. Don't think I won't." I start to get up and she reaches out for my hand, "Please stay." I nod and sit back down, pulling her into my side as I wrap my arm around her. We sit there watching the last of the daylight slip behind the mountain and waiting for the stars to appear.

Later as we walk back inside the mill, Abraham stops me to ask about my mechanical abilities. I wave Rowan off and she heads upstairs to our room. Once I answer Abraham's questions I climb the stairs to my room. I open the door and see Rowan opening the shoebox I left on the bed. As she lifts the lid I push the door closed and tell her, "Happy Birthday Rowan." She glances over at me as she pulls the necklace out of the box and gives me a small smile. Her eyes focus on the necklace and her small smile turns into a huge grin. She looks back up at me as I sit down next to her and says, "Where did you find this?" I shrug, "In town. I thought ya might like it, sorry it's not fancy or nothing." She wraps her arms around my neck, pulling me in for a kiss as she murmurs, "It's perfect Daryl, thank you!" I kiss her lightly as I tell her, "Yer welcome princess." She looks down into the box and then back at me, raising an eyebrow, "Is this what I think it is?" I shrug, "Umm maybe?" She pulls the silky green teddy out of the box, holding it up to herself. She looks at me, "Is this the one from Walmart?" I nod as I mumble, "Yeah I grabbed it off the shelf when nobody was looking. I thought you'd look nice in it." She grins, "Nice?" She succeeds in making me squirm and I mutter, "Okay fine, I thought ya'd look sexy, happy now?" She laughs at my uncomfortableness as gets up to she straddle my lap, "Its fine Daryl, I'm just messing with ya. If ya want me to, I'll wear it fer ya." I groan as she settles herself into my lap and nuzzles my ear as I tell her, "Ya better believe yer gonna wear it.  I've had the frilly thing in my bag all this damn time, anyone could have seen it." She giggles, "I doubt they would have thought you were gonna wear it Dixon." I groan, "Enough woman, just kiss me."

She pulls back to look at me and I reach up, cupping her face so I can pull her lips to mine. I lie back on the bed bringing her down with me as I kiss her senseless. As I shift my kisses to her neck she mumbles, "Don't ferget, we got watch tonight." I groan, "Shit I fergot, damn it." She kisses at my collarbone as she whispers, "Well we could always have a quickie." I shake my head, "If I get naked in this bed with ya, I ain't gittin' out till tomorrow." She groans in disappointment, "Fine! Yer a tease, ya know that Dixon." I chuckle, "But ya like me anyway." She nods, "Ya I do." I kiss her forehead as she rolls off of me; cuddling into my side, her head resting in the crook of my shoulder. We lie there quietly, calming down and she softly says, "Thank you fer the gifts, I never expected anything." I kiss her temple as I softly answer, "Yer welcome princess."

**One more chapter for ya!  I hope this answers a couple of questions that you may have had.  I'm trying to pull elements from previous chapters to fill out the story, hopefully you'll all like this.  

As always, let me know what you think, feel free to ask me questions and please vote.  Thanks so much for taking the time to read this!!!  Love ya Angels!!