Chemistry

Chapter 13

I must have cried myself to sleep, because, when I wake up, I am still in Wasabi's backseat and the sun is rising.

The smell of strong, black coffee fills the air.

I sit up, wiping my stinging eyes.

I remember what must have been the previous day's events, and it hits me like a truck.

My heart actually aches.

But I have cried myself out, and no tears come.

Wasabi looks in his rear view mirror and smiles slightly.

"Good morning."

"Good morning.  Why didn't you take me home?"

"I though it would be best if you had a bit of company.  After last night...". Wasabi trails off.

I give a watery grin.  "Thanks Wasabi."

He pulls over the car.  "Want to move up here?"

I scoot over to the door and change seats.

"Breakfast?" Wasabi points to a bag and a plastic Celestial Coffee cup of lemongrass tea.

I gratefully pick up the tea and sip it.

The taste brings me back to dinner at Tadashi's house.

I break down again just as Wasabi pulls into the highway.

He sits in silence as I sob into my tea, then slowly calm down enough to drink it.   I open the bag.  He got a scone for me.

I take it gratefully and bite into it.

"Do you want me to take you home?" Wasabi asks.

"Um, sure."

"What's the address?"

"157 Bay Street.  Apartment F," I state, and then remember the last time I said that.

I hold in the tears this time as he takes me home and stops the car.

I reach for the bag of food but he takes it. "I can take this up for you."

He follows me up the stairs and I unlock the door.

Wasabi smiles as he hands me the bag and I smile back before he leaves.

I set the bag down on the table and open it. There is still one more scone and a paper in it.

I reach in the grab the paper, thinking it is a receipt, but the paper is different.

The paper is folded, so I open it.

Inside, it says:

555-4862
If you ever need anything
--Wasabi

I lay it out on the table and took out the scone. I don't have the appetite to eat anything else, so I put it in a plastic bag and close it up.

I spend the rest of the day in bed, not wanting to move.

Finally, I decide that, if I call Tadashi, maybe he won't be gone.

I dial his number and hitch myself up on my pillow.

"Hey, it's Tadashi! You've missed me, so I'm probably hanging out with my girlfriend Honey Lemon here."

I can pick out my own voice saying "hey!" before the tone buzzes and I hang up.

I give a hiccupy laugh as I remember when we recorded that, when he got his new phone.

I lay back on my bed, overwhelmed by the crushing grief. Then I get a call.

For a second I think it is Tadashi, but then I see the caller ID.

"Hello?" I say.

"Hi, Honey Lemon. I came to call about the memorial service." Aunt Cass sounds the same as I feel.

I nod into the phone, then say, "yeah."

"We're planning on holding it this Saturday. At Sakura Cemetery. Can you come?"

I can't speak. I clear my throat. "Yeah."

"Thank you. Tadashi would have wanted you to come."

Aunt Cass sounds strained, and she hangs before she said goodbye.

His memorial is in three days. I check to see if I have anything black.

Nothing.

I don't want to leave the apartment, but I have to.

I make a list of the things I need and put it next to the door.

"Tomorrow," I tell it.