The all-knowing Player (Solo Leveling)

To spend money

"I can't believe it." Seon-Ji crosses her arms, staring at me with a frown. "So, you're telling me that you suddenly got your memory back with no reason, but can't remember anything from before you came to the orphanage? Seriously, Hee-Jin, what exactly happened?"

"I don't exactly know, either," I lie and slump on our couch next to her. It softly creaks under my weight before the comforter's shape adjusts around my body. I let myself sink into the pillows, relaxing at the contact of their soft texture against my back. "My memories went back gradually after I dreamt of the double dungeon. But it's still blurry, and I don't know everything yet. It'll surely come back, too. In the end, I'll just have to wait."

"Then why are you so eager to ask us about your past now?" Yool asks, preferring to sit on a pillow he set on the floor behind the wooden coffee table. He lifts the mug of tea around which he wrapped his fingers and takes a sip of the drink.

I fall silent for a moment. Maybe asking them wasn't a good idea. But I wanted to try. "I'm getting the feeling that whatever happened to me before I entered the orphanage was horrible. I want to be prepared to face it."

He shakes his head. "There's no use in doing that. Sure, you'll probably feel better if you have a clue, but we can't tell you. This is your past. It's yours to discover, not ours to tell. Moreover," he directs his gaze to his mug, "you never really told us. You were pretty silent at your arrival at the orphanage. We had to put a lot of effort into getting you to open up to us. And Ahjussi refused to tell us, too, saying that it would be best for you to just move on and adapt to this new life."

"So you don't know, either," I conclude, pressing my lips together to hide my disappointment.

Seon-Ji lets her head fall in my lap. Her shoulders shift against my legs before finding a comfortable position, sharing some of her warmth with me. When she looks up at me, her brown eyes shine with affection and trust.

"Is it really important, though?" she asks. "Whatever happened to you back then doesn't define who you are. Your present is more important than any memory you might or might not have."

Her words are unexpectedly reassuring. She's right: I matter more than my past. And whatever it is, it won't change who I am.

I offer her a thankful smile. "Yeah. Thank you."

I lift my hand to play with her hair as we fall into a comfortable silence. Her hair is messy, and its tips are in a bad shape, almost a bit rough—a stark contrast to Jin-Woo's soft strands. But it doesn't matter: she closes her eyes in delight and lets me run my fingers through her locks, a light smile playing with the corners of her lips. The ticking of the clock hanging in the hallway fills the apartment with its familiar regularity, punctuated by Yool's occasional swallowing as he sips on his tea. Wafts of the hot drink fill the room with the subtle scent of bergamot oranges. Warm beams of the morning sun spill through the window, covering the room in its yellow light.

"On another note, I was planning on going on a dungeon cleaning trip with Jin-Woo for a week or so. We'll be out of contact for a while," I declare out of the blue.

Yool chokes on his tea upon hearing my sudden announcement. "Are you serious? Why now, out of nowhere?" He sets his mug on the table to focus on me.

"Can we go with you?" Seon-Ji demands, leaning on her arms to sit up properly—yet the sharp edge to her voice indicates that it wasn't a question.

I shake my head. "I can't give you many details, but it's something only the two of us can do. You won't be allowed in the dungeon, anyway."

"Did you integrate another strike squad?" he guesses with a discontented frown. "Why do you never tell us anything before making such a decision?"