The Love That Took Fucking Forever

Chapter One

asexual -

a person who has no sexual feelings or desires

Karen wore a grey dress, discreet and asexual. She glanced down at her watch. Sighing, she picked up her phone, her face briefly illuminated.

I stare, slack-jawed. Something about her face made me enticed. Her wavy long brunette hair flowed so gently across her eye. She glances over to me, I think we make eye contact. I hide. My heart races, and a smirk slides from the corner of my mouth. I rise slowly from beneath the desk. She isn't there.

Andy raises a mug and leers to me. I grin and nod my head, awkwardly. Andy resumes talking to Simon, who is crying at the thought of losing his job. Simon turns to me briefly, he has a tisue hanging from his nose. I smile to him.

It's lunch break. I was fed up with going to the same bar so I just spent time walking around town. I usely spend time window shopping but I didn't feel like that today. I walked three doors down to the bakery. While looking at the buns I spot Karen's refecction in the shop window. I turn around, suprised.
'Karen, right?'
She smiles. 'Oh, you're the creepy stare guy.'
I blush. 'That's me.'
We both laugh, followed by an awkward silence.
'So...' we both say at the same time.
Karen swings her arms by her side. Her hands are small, her arms thin and with cut marks down her right arm.
'What happened to your arm?' I chuckle.
She looks away, embarrassed. I relised my mistake.
'Oh shit, sorry.' I feel kind of guilty.
She smiles, 'it's okay, I get asked about my arm alot, it's not just you.'
Still feeling guilty, I apologise again before walking in the bakery. She follows, picking up two loafs of bread and placing them in a bag. She itches her eyebrow, and prepares to speak.
'Don't worry about it, it's only self harm. It ain't the end of the world. If you really want to know why I did it, I will tell you.'
I interupt her. 'No need, don't tell me. You were depressed and you regret it. I understand'
'I don't regret it.'
I look confused.
'After I did it, I relised no boy is worth what I have and then I lived without worry of what anyone thought. Go on, say something horrible about me?'
'Are you sure?'
She smiles. 'Go ahead.'
I beathe in and out and then speak.
'You have... a bit too... wavy hair, you look a bit like a goth and your house is probally a mess. Oh and I feel sorry for your parents.'
She looks shocked, her eyes lower and she looks to the ground hurt.
'Sorry, I am really sorry. Forget what I said.'
'That really hurts' she says, wiping away her eyes, with her sleeve.
'Really?'
She looks up and speaks.
'No, you dipshit.'
I look confused.
'I don't care what people say, I really couldn't care.'
I stop worrying for a second, she was a good actress, I'll give her that.
'Can I tell you why I don't care?'
I start to think of every posible answer.

'I'm a serial killer,' Karen breathes as she plunges a dagger into my frail chest and I bleed all over the bakery.

'I'm your mother!' Karen laughs, throwing her hands around my neck and leads me away, telling me stories of the Vietnam War.

'I'm not real,' Karen whispers and starts to fade away.

'I dont really like bread! Ha ha!' she laughs evilly, and throws the bread in my face and runs away, cackling under her cape.

'I'm not Karen,' comedian John Oliver says, lifting off his mask and exploding.

'Because I am you,' Karen becomes me in a serious of flashbacks that explain her hair colour.

'Well,' she says, 'do you want to know?'

I stop daydreaming and answer.
'Yeah, why do you not care?'
She breathes in, then out.
'I'm Asexuaul'
I look confused.
'A sexual what?' I say, thinking it would be funny if she said deviant.
'Just Asexual' she says.
I still look confused.
'I have no sexual attraction to anyone!' She shouts, alerting a woman and three children behind her.
'You mean...'
'Yes, I will never love you, sorry'
My heart drops.
'It will never be.' She says.

She leaves the shop and forgets to pay for the bread.