The Pessimists Guide: On Being A Hero

Chapter 1

It started just like any other day. I woke up late, I checked my phone, I washed myself, I scrubbed my teeth, I checked my phone again, I fell down the stairs while using my phone, I had breakfast, I missed the bus, I got to school late, I got detention. Yuuup, today was gonna be like all the others. Except that it wasn't, but you already guessed that. Didn't you?

I should probably introduce myself properly. Hi, I'm Zachary Quinder, my friends (or lack thereof)  call me Zac. I'm no one special, just another kid trying to finish school and get good grades. My two best mates here are Jack and Jill. Jill's name is actually Petunia Jill Barrington, so you can see why she answers to Jill. Also she didn't count on a boy arriving at her school named Jack so none of this is their fault, ok?

No, they're not brother and sister, no they aren't related in any way, shape, or form, no they did not run up a hill to fetch a pail of water, then fall down and break every bone in their bodies. It was actually just ice cream, they ran up my road(which incidentally happens to be a hill), they fell down, and Jack went rolling all the way to the bottom. Because he's clumsy like that.

Anyways, today was just long. Had double maths at the very start of the morning, because our head obviously hates our guts, PE was straight after, because our head obviously hates our guts, then there was English, because our head obviously........... Ughhhh, you get the point. By the time lunch rolled around, I was so happy I could fly.

Not literally.

Not yet anyways.

My enthusiasm for lunch was suddenly interrupted a chip hitting my face. I looked at Jack.

Jack looked at Jill.

Jill looked off into the distance and started whistling.

I threw a chip at her, but missed.

Evan Taylor turned around, wiped a smashed chip off his face, and glared at me.

Just so you know, Evan Taylor is the school's hero. He won our football season, our dodgeball season(never even knew there was such a thing), our swimming season, our tennis season......  He's basically the school's biggest athlete. And the school's biggest bully. So what do you do when you, a puny ant, throws food at Evan Taylor??

Well bowing down on the floor and saying sorry won't help, he'll just use you as a football!

Jill looked over at me and smirked.

Jack looked over at me and mouthed, "Nice knowing you"

I stood on the table and yelled, "FOOD FIGHT!"

And that is how I landed myself another detention in one day...........
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You can probably imagine the walk home, after single-handedly cleaning up both my classroom and the cafeteria, my joints were aching in places I never even knew I had!  I'd missed the last bus so I was walking for an hour before I forget home, because the timetable in my area is a myth and a half: The buses run once every hour, and the last one leaves at five. On the dot. And somehow, while knowing this, I still managed to miss it.

So when I got home, I wasn't really thinking straight, I washed my hands, didn't even glance at the towel, grabbed my phone charger by the metal teeth, and without switching the electric current off, tried to push it in.

Next thing I felt was a huge spike of pain everywhere as I yelled, and screamed, and cried! But suddenly it was all gone. I looked at my hand, and wondered why it was smoking, then I looked up, and saw three blue birds circling my head. Before I even had a chance to wonder how they got in, everything went black, and I dropped.

A/N: Pretty short, I know, but they'll get bigger. Tell me what you think in the comments, and vote!