"Look Louis I recently got the birth control implant, so we are good for 3 years." She shows him her bitch arm that has a bandaid placed on her ugly skin. " Touch it." She takes his hands and pushes it down on her skin so he feels the disgusting thing hidden underneath her zombie like skin.
" Ew that is fooking gross." He pulls back his hand and dowses his hands in hand sanitizer, also just to be sure he washes his hands with a gallon of soap.
" Its 99% safe Louis." Briana tries to assure him while taking off her shirt exposing her rib boobs, Louis shields his face from the sight.
" What about the other 1%?" He questions skeptically, he was never good with numbers.
" That doesn't matter, c'mon lets just do it." She tries to sound seductive but sounds like a rhino giving birth to a whale. Louis prays to the heavens that he will not be that 1% before plunging his man meat into her roast beef.
9 months later a child that is half human and half horse is awkwardly placed in his arm.
" Why the fook is this child a centaur!" Louis yells outraged that Briana lied to him about this being his child. She looks taking aback by his loud yelling.
"Can we talk later I'm exhausted." She closes her eyes looking like a drug up hooker.
" This thing slid right out, your pussy is like a manhole." He scoffs, the door is kicked open revealing a grown centaur.
" Take your child you freak, this is your job." Louis throws the abomination to the centaur. He walks out of the hospital and lights a cigarette, he takes a drag before thinking,
"Looks like I wasn't the 1%, those fooking losahs can suck my dick."
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Gold Digger; A guide to getting Louis Tomlinson to impregnate you.
FanfictionHave you ever wonder how to get Louis Tomlinson to impregnate you? Well we did and then we made this guide, so enjoy
