Irresistible || JarDougall (Lesbian Story)

Chapter 10

{Jenna}

I felt bad for lying to Tay but I knew she wouldn't understand if I told her the truth. I knew that her and Hayley had bad history, I also knew Hayley had obviously changed since her and Tay were dating. Was it kind of weird to be friends with my current girlfriend's ex? Probably.

I walked down the dorm hallway to Hayley's room, glancing back at the direction of Tay and Lynn's. Hayley had been going through some stuff with her current boyfriend that I'd been trying to help her out with. They weren't speaking at the moment and Hayley was upset, so I wanted to be a good friend and try to reassure her. I knocked on her door twice and then waited for her to answer. The door opened to reveal Hayley who instantly pulled me inside the room.

"Thanks for coming over, I just don't know who else to talk to." Hayley sighed and sat down on her bed, putting her head in her hands. I sat down beside her and thought of the words to say.

"Did anything happen since the last time we talked?" I asked, trying to understand the situation. Hayley had told me her and her boyfriend hadn't been talking, maybe she had left out details.

"Jenna, he broke up with me this morning." Hayley said quietly and I heard her sniffle. Her hands were still covering most of her face but I saw a tear roll down the bottom of her cheek, alerting me that she was crying. I put my arm around Hayley to try and comfort her in some way. She leaned into me and continued crying quietly.

"Listen Hayley, you're a really nice person when you want to be, that guy didn't deserve you anyways. Maybe this is for the best, did you really see yourself being with that guy forever? You'll get over him in no time." I said. I felt her nod against my shoulder.

"You're probably right." Hayley agreed, and sat back a little so she was no longer leaning against me. Hayley wiped her eyes with the sleeves of the shirt she was wearing. She sniffled again.

"You okay?" I asked and she nodded again. I was slightly surprised by how quickly she was able to recover from this and also happy. I didn't like seeing my friends upset or in a bad mood, I liked cheering them up.

"You really think I'm a nice person?" She questioned me with raised eyebrows.

"Of course, you're so kind. Honestly, anyone would be lucky to have you. You're nice, funny, interesting, and tons of other things." I grinned at her and she smiled back, blushing slightly. I was happy to make Hayley feel better after this.

"Really, thank you Jenna. I couldn't ask for someone as kind as you." She sighed and wiped her eyes one last time.

Hayley reached out to hug me, or so I thought. I leaned forward and put my arms around her waist and then the unexpected happened; she didn't move her head to the side as you usually would for a hug, Hayley kissed me. My reaction was extremely slow, I felt so bad for her and what she had been going through. I didn't want to lead her on but I also didn't want to reject her right after she had been by rejected by someone she really liked. I slightly moved my lips against hers for a split second before my mind went into panic. This was wrong, all wrong. I pulled away from her with wide eyes and stood up from the bed. Tay. I had basically just cheated on Tay. What was wrong with me!?

"Jenna-" I shook my head and pretty much ran out of the room, not bothering to close the door behind me. What was I going to do? My mind had betrayed me and I forgot about the most amazing girl ever. I kept my head down as I quickly walked to my car and started driving home. I had to tell Tay. I had to tell her before Hayley said something. I couldn't lie to her, or would only make this worse. I would tell her before this weekend. This entire situation was breaking my heart. Why did I kiss Hayley back?

I knew I didn't have feelings for Hayley. How could I think that kissing Hayley back to make her feel better was a good idea? I have a girlfriend. It dawned on me, I was going to have to put Tay through the same thing I was put through. The same thing that fueled my need to move.

I was 16 when I met my first girlfriend, at the time I thought she was the prettiest girl in the world. Her name was Mary. She had short hair dyed a lilac color that framed her face perfectly and made me want to run my fingers through it for hours. She was older than me by five years and she was much more experienced than me. I was so in love with her but she didn't feel the same way. She said she loved me and at the time I couldn't see that she didn't mean it, she was using me.

I thought it was my fault the first time she cheated on me, I blamed myself for being too clingy. I changed myself for her but she cheated on me again. I finally broke up with her, the damage was already done though. It ruined my self esteem, I really thought I was to blame for her cheating on me. After that, I was afraid to get close to anyone, I didn't date anyone for a year and I was too scared to invest myself fully in a relationship once I did start dating again. I met Tay though, at first I was frightened she would turn out just like Mary but I guess I had that all backwards. I was like Mary.

I don't know how I could do this to Tay. How was I going to put her through this?

I pulled into the parking area for mine and Ashley's apartment and I could no longer hold back the tears. I was such a terrible person. I was so angry at myself, this was all my fault.

...

Okay Spotify, just play a ton of sad muse songs, that's totally fine... not.
I hope you guys liked this chapter!

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