aching hearts and flower laced shoulders [COMPLETED, UNDER RECONSTRUCTION]

2

There are a lot of fragile things stacked on my bed. It's difficult to get in a comfortable position to sleep in. The room is freezing, so I pulled the blanket over myself and I was trying to warm myself up, but I can't rub my arms because my hands are just as cold as the walls.

I don't feel any motivation today. I only feel sad, lonely, and tired. It's when I have days like this where everything overwhelms me and I scrutinize every detail and I scream simply because I want someone to scream back. Because I want to confirm what I'm feeling. I want to know that you're angry at me. That I'm burdening you somehow.

It's days like this where I feel like my heart has been broken into millions of microscopic pieces and spread across the world, and there is no hope of collecting the shrapnel.

It's on days like this that I feel like the room is getting smaller and I am getting bigger. Where sunlight reminds me of a time that I didn't have days like this. I could have stopped it. I could have saved myself from this incredible pain.

It's days like this that leave me exhausted although I've done nothing but lay in bed for hours.

I never want to have one of these days again, and I always tell myself that I won't let them. But they always come back. Always.

a.n.: thank you for reading! also a big thanks to the people who have voted on this (although very few). vote comment and share!