Tape • NH

22

Chapter Twenty Two, I Feel Weird

x

      You know that feeling you get when you wake up and believe everything  that happened the previous day was all apart of your dream, until you  realize it wasn't? Yeah, so that's what happened to me when I woke up  the next day. My head automatically turned to my desk where the single  rose stayed in its vase. I would have just picked up the vase and thrown  it against the wall out of frustration, but it held  too much  significance that I was still trying to figure out.

      I glanced at the clock after a minute or five and noticed that I had  around forty minutes to get ready for school, but I didn't want to. I  wanted to stay home and possibly do absolutely nothing while the jumbled  gloop Carmen made of my brain sorted itself out. I needed an entire day  and weekend away from her and everything to figure out what my next  move would be. Going to school would only make me nervous and way too  cautious about screwing up.

      Knowing I couldn't simply just stay locked up in my room, I made my way  to my parents room at the end of the hall. I figured they would already  be awake and gone, but thought I should check in their room to see if  maybe my mom was there still getting ready. She could be putting on her  shoes as I walk in. Well that's I assumed as I walked right in their  room.

      "Can I stay home?" I asked right as I was turning my head and body to  face my parents, only to be met with the picture I have feared of and  dreaded my entire freaking life.

      "Um, one moment," my mom told me as she desperately tried grasping the  bed sheet to cover herself while my dad was bending down beside the bed  to pick up his shorts.

      Why I stood frozen and unable to move, I still don't know. My eyes were  wide and I was probably stunned beyond recovery, but somehow within a  second's timing, I managed to turn around and quickly walk out of my  nightmare unscathed. Okay, there was my mind that was incredibly  traumatized for the rest of my total existence. I ended up quickly  walking out of the room and down the hall until I broke out into a run. I  went down the stairs, through the living room and straight to the  kitchen. I poured myself a glass of water and desperately tried to calm  myself down.

      I just saw what every kid hates seeing. I experienced what I had  believed I would never experience. I want to fall into a hole and just  live there and never see my parents ever again.

     I cannot look at my parents.

      The image, as much as I wanted it to incinerate into nothing as it  should, stayed glued to my mind and the whole thing played over and over  like a broken record. This must be what the end of the world is like.  For some strange reason I thought the world was punishing me for  something I did wrong. I thought I was getting a taste of hell to be  scared. I only wanted to stay home and figure out what I wanted to do  about my feelings towards Carmen. I didn't want to see my parents... in  that position.

     Aw, gross!

      I gulped the remaining water down and filled my glass again. I heard  footsteps from behind me, but chose to ignore them as I stared out of  the kitchen window. Cupboards opened and closed, the fridge was searched  through, and things were taken out. My parents were in the kitchen  probably making tea and coffee, but I continued drinking water. They  were making what had happened even more awkward whether they were trying  or not, and I kept praying that we wouldn't have to talk about it at  all.

     "Niall?" I heard my mom say and my dad cleared his throat right after. I wanted to fall unconscious right then and there.

     "Yeah?" I answered back, unsure if I wanted to know where this conversation may lead to.