He Ruined My Life (#Wattys2015)

Chapter X

I slowly fumbled around in my pocket for something I could easily cut myself with. All I came up with was a pair of especially blunt scissors. That wouldn't do. I turned around and felt something jab me. I turned back around. Perfect. There was a tiny hook--probably a small error made by someone who made it--on the gate. It was sharp at the edge. Perfect. I put a part of my arm against it and pulled my arm down quickly. It took all my willpower not to gasp. It had opened a small gash on the side. It wasn't too deep, but the pain was enough to keep me occupied for a few minutes. For a while, everything faded. It was just my wound and me. Then the reality came crashing down on me, and I wished that I could have kept that one minute when my pain was minimized.

The bell rung. Shoot. I'm late for class. I pick myself up and slowly stand up, letting my hood fall over my face. I use a tissue to staunch the blood, and covered up my wound with my hoodie's sleeve. I trudge into the school.

I arrived at my homeroom just in time and slide into my seat. The teacher starts talking about a bunch of random stuff.

"Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah cyberspace blah blah blah Facebook blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah bullying blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah cyber bullying blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah Alyssandra--"

Wait, what? I jerk my head up sharply and start paying attention.

"We have a victim of cyberbullying here. You all know that she's not a freak, but the person who cyberbullied her made it seem so. So we should try to prevent these things from happening." The teacher lectured. I could tell the school made her do this, since she was looking at me with a slightly disgusted--even a little scared--expression. Then I realized that all eyes were on me except for my former best friend group, which were looking away. Leah was doodling, Cameron was playing with his pencil, Nick pretended to be studying for a science quiz, and Erik was just staring ahead blankly. I wanted to escape all those stares. I suddenly remembered my math worksheet I still had to do. Homework was a savior.

I dug in my back and started doing it, but all I could think of was how Chase had humiliated me in front of the entire world. This was hopeless, and I couldn't take my mind off it. I only managed to finish two questions before the bell rang. I had two more break times before it was due, and it didn't help that there were at least 20 questions on it. I decided I was going to have to do it in the classes.

I only barely finished it in time for Math. Even as I sat there taking notes, I could feel all eyes on me, including the teacher's. He tried not to stare, but he failed. He did stare. I couldn't blame him. I was so stupid!

Later after school, I walked to a nearby store and bought a Swiss Army knife. I sighed a little when I gave myself a second little cut next to the first one. I wiped off the blood with the tissue I used to staunch the flow of blood on my first wound and used the same tissue to "bandage" the second one. I slipped the knife into my pencil case and walked home alone.

I was disappointed by my parents. They gave me a stern lecture on keeping things from them and my mom gave me an earful. First one I got in my life. They were that angry. Kent ignored me for the first half of the time, but when I was staring blankly at the computer screen, Kent walked in. He pulled a chair from a corner of my room and dragged it over next to me.

"You know," he said, sitting himself down, "I know Chase, and I've disliked him for a long time. He's really full of himself in real life. I reported him in Instagram, Facebook, basically a bunch of other social media. I'm not sure that is going to do any good, though."

"Thanks." I mumbled.

"I know it's not easy, but you brought this upon yourself, and you have to take the responsibility. Nobody can help you much, Alysse. I tried my best. I want you to be brave and smack the dude in the face, ok?" He said quietly. I nodded, and a tear rolled down my cheek. Kent gently wiped it off. "Be brave, Alysse." He whispered, and left the room.

I slowly logged onto my computer and saw that Leah had Facebooked me. I read her message.

"K al, I'm gonna tell u smth. U know u broke Erik's heart. He used to like u, u know. If u had told him u had an online date, then he would've moved on. But jeez al, u had to let us know this way. Meet me @ the classroom 2morro & I'll tell u smth else."

I stared at the message with shock. ERIK USED TO LIKE ME? Now that I think back, it was obvious. He was slightly awkward around me, and kinda shy even though everyone else said he was very open. Jeez, how am I such a selfish little brat?!

I checked that nobody was looking and locked the door. I took out my knife again and gave myself one last cut. I have to pack some tissues for school tomorrow, I think I'm going to need to cut at school if I'm going to survive it. I sighed as the pain flooded in, giving me a smaller amount of pain than I once had. I know I can't live my entire life depending on cuts, but I will have to do this. Just for now.

Hi readers.

Alright, I know this story might be depressing some of you now, but I'm sorry, that's what bullying is like.

If anyone finds this somehow offensive, I'm sorry too. That would be something completely unintentional. I'm not really targeting anyone with this story, and the characters are not based off real life people. Only Alysse, which is a mixture of the best qualities about some of my friends.

But yeah. I'll see you soon with the story.

Eugeniax