What If...

What if, I've never had scoliosis in the first place? What if I was totally normal? What if, nobody left me? What if, I was loved by my friends?

There are too many questions if I keep on thinking 'what if'. The fact is the fact. What's happened, happened, and it's all in His hands. I shouldn't keep wondering , 'what if', because it would make me imagine too much trash. Yes, trash.

I came to understand this: in life, you have to realise, that if nothing works your way, that's because God's way is much better. Who understands me more than God, my creator?

I opened my Instagram when it was exactly one year from the surgery already, and I want to share this to you too. I want us all to remember, that we should stop saying the 'what ifs'. We should start saying 'go on'. I hope you loved my testimony :) :

Before and after. Okay. So. It's FINALLY BEEN A YEAR!! Yesterday, July 23rd, it became 1 year post surgery. A little story:

God's time isn't our time. I had dreams, plans, that were set to do last year. All of a sudden, God brought me to a hospital and this happened. My dreams and plans cluttered in a second. I felt lost. A dead end. BUT I realised, that if I hadnt gone to the doctor that day, maybe it cudve been too late. It was 72 degrees already. Maybe I cudve gotten a complication. And maybe, I cudnt dance anymore. The surgery was a success. I cudve died during the major surgery--it was between life and death. But God guided the doctor's hands, and I got safely across the bridge.

I got 1 year's rest, to prepare myself for things ahead, and most importantly God prepared me. Even if I had to skip ballet for a year, God made me realize, there are lots of other things I cud do. There are many talents waiting for me to find them. He held me back, to make me jump further forward. I understood, that cluttered plans of mine, didn't matter, because God has His own plans for me. And who knows me better than God?
I came to re-organize my perplexions about His uncomfortable grace. And I came to profoundly understand, that everything is beautiful in His time.

Thanks for reading!!