Illusion (Ziall Horlik) AU

Chapter 18

Zayn's POV

The next morning I woke up with Niall wrapped around me. He was cuddled so tightly to me it was like he was making sure I wouldn't even think about moving away from him. After our talking last night, we both called it a night and curled up to each other to get some sleep. I managed to get out of his grip without waking him up.

I found myself downstairs making a cup of coffee. Every since I had to repaint my art project for class, I had become dependant on the caffeine beverage. It's the only way I can fully get my medicated sleep out of my system and wake up. If I don't have it I fall asleep in random places in class and that's a big problem for me. So, I get my coffee fix in the morning and afternoon because sleep is still a hard thing for me.

"Morning, sunshine. You need to shave, love." My mum told me as she walked into the kitchen in her robe covering her pajamas. She had a bright smile on her face like she was just happy to be able to see me in the morning. I missed her, but I think after my diagnosis I think we all needed to take time to miss each other with how high tension was running. I got a kiss on my stubble covered cheek, but I had a bruse under the hair making me flinch back. I didn't know how that bruse got there, but I can only guess it was from when I purposely drugged myself before Jace had sex with me.

"Zayn, we've always had an open relationship and have talked about everything. Your dad told me last night he's worried about you because you came home looking like we sent you to a fight club. Can you tell me what happened? I won't be mad if it's from a fight or some type of sex thing. I don't care because you're a responsible adult, I just need to know you're going to be okay and you're safe." My mum told me as she pulled me over to the kitchen table. A blush hit my cheeks as I thought of the fact she thought I had some pain kink then I felt embarrassed that my mum would ask me that. I took a few sips of my coffee, thinking if I should tell her the truth or if I should just let it hide in the back of my life where I keep all my other secrets.

"Do you like Niall?" I asked her, changing the subject. She seemed confused on how fast I changed things on her, but sighed anyway and nodded to me.

"Does he know about you? Also, you're not trying to replace your dreams or whatever with him, right? He's a nice boy and I would love if he were more than your friend, but I don't want you to jump into things." She told me seriously. I was going to tell her that Niall was allot more than who she thinks he is to me, but she reached her hand out and pulled my white t-shirt down to see the bite marks that had scared my collar bones. Jace had a thing for making sure I knew I was his and doing that by biting me. My mum's face went pale before she went into seriously mum mode.

"Zayn, what did you get yourself into? Those are bite marks and you have fading bruses on your neck. Please talk to me." She begged me. I pulled my shirt up from her grip then shook my head because there is no way I'll ever tell my mum I was raped. That's beyond personal and it felt like it was my fault I didn't fight Jace off. I always just accepted that he was going to do it and to stop fighting him. Also, once again, she would be dissapointed that I wasn't her strong boy after all.

"What exactly did you do with that boyfriend of yours?" She asked me. I shook my head and bit my busted bottom lip because I felt my throat closing up. She placed her hand on my cheek gently and nodded for me to tell her.

"You won't love me anymore." I whimpered to her, then got up and left the room before I could break down in front her. I walked into my bedroom and saw Niall had just finished making my bed. He turned to me and smiled, but when he saw the few tears down my face, his smile fell and he came over to pull me to sit on the bed. He wiped my face and kept telling me everything would be okay.

"Do you want to talk, or just move on?" Niall asked me after I pulled myself together. I nodded for the second option and got myself dressed for the day. Once I was in a black sweater and some black skinny jeans, I fixed my hair before taking Niall downstairs to get some breakfast.