The Concept is Simple (Sequel to You're Crazy)

Chapter 20

I had never felt so dizzy. Even lying in bed at night I felt myself rotating, spiralling downwards. There was no escape. It was the sickest I've ever felt. It didn't help matters around me everyone was moving, always doing something. I quite fancied having a remote control and pressing pause to stop the action for just moment, either that or a remote control I could throw at the next person I heard shouting. My spitting headache felt like it would explode.

I had been complaining about how quiet the flat had gotten in recent weeks and how everything felt like it had been shutting down. Well, exactly when I didn't wanted to, everything suddenly churned into action. Months had passed, slipping by one after the other - I didn't even realise where they were going and I didn't feel them pass. So it was with an understandable degree of mortification that when I turned over one morning while lying in bed trying to concentrate on anything but the smell of eggs wafting up from the kitchen, I saw the date lit up on my phone. It was the 1st of September. How the hell had that happened? Where had all my time gone? Tomorrow me, Briony and Charlie were heading out to France; me to help my 'rents with stuff and the others said  it was to 'visit their dad' who lived in a nearby town to mine but I think it was just really to keep me company, which was sort of sweet. And then all the others were coming down at the weekend. 

Since our night of freedom when Nathan took me to Mahiki, things had been a bit non stop. I had buckled down with my work and stockpiled material for the month of September and Nath and all the boys had brought out an album and taken off on tour all of last month. So it was a bit lonely without him, but at least it wasn't like last year when he took off for 3 months. I don't think I could take him being away from home like that again. 

And then last week, my holiday from work officially started but before I left I handed in the song to Brain Freeze - their 'career defining' number one material song. I'd driven up to Jenny's intimidating office and handed her the memory stick. She'd looked at me like she was in pain. Apparently she had forgotten to tell me that they no longer needed my song and had taken the contract in the States. Being an idiot, it took a few seconds for it to sink in that she was firing me and that my boys, my band were being taken away from me. Not to mention she made me waste the last few months before my wedding needlessly fretting over a shitty song. When I realised I turned around and left. Very unprofessional but it took all I could not to shake with anger. This was a massive step down. 

It was that evening that I'd begun to feel ill -  probably stress related. I had no intention to tell and worry Nathan while he was on tour but when I was throwing up my guts later on in the evening he called and Briony told him what I was doing. Ever since he's been calling about two times a day and it's mainly been Briony answering since I couldn't really speak. She's pretty much camped out at her house whilst she's helping with the preparations which really irritates Charlie so it's been feeling like old times which is good. 

My illness has been making me a bit nostalgic and I've cried a few times. I felt another wave of nostalgia roll over me as I realised this was my last night in my flat. Briony had, helpfully, told Nathan about this which only got him more worried. He and the boys are arriving back today and I can't wait to see them all. I can't remember how I got by without them. 

Sitting up in bed, I waited for the dizziness to pass. When I realised it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon I groaned and got to my feet. After a week of feeling indulgent and self pitying it was time to shake it off, I had no other choice. I opened the blinds slowly but the light that flooded my little room jolted straight to my head and I fell over in fright. 

"DID YOU DIE?" Briony yelled  as she flung herself through the door to my room. I chuckled a mirthless laugh and let her help me to my feet. She waited for my legs to stop wobbling, I hadn't stood up for a while, before backing off. "Okay, now we've established your alive - time for paracetamol, food and prep." She glanced around my completely empty room apart from the bed.