I am bi...bili...bilingual? Basically, I learned english as my second language so please excuse my French. (At least, that's what mom says before she gets angry.)
Grandma tried to yell at me for sneezing on her food...bitch what?
Brother had to light the candle for prayer. Of course, this blob can't do anything to save his life so I waddled/casually strolled over to him and waited patiently. Then this piece of trash tried to see if the lighter was still hot after the candle was lit. So this dipshit put the hotass lighter on my hand! What the actual hell. It burned like my dad's ugliness and my brilliant, educated mother put Vaseline on the burn. Thanks, now my burn won't be chapped.
Life really needs to start looking up or imma walk out dis' joint faster than Dora can pull out Map.
* author: idk why I'm making it so vulgar and the dialogue so stupid - I'm in a weird mood lol. but I lowkey think I was a badass pimp as a toddler.
