{SLOW UPDATES} Éternel: Between Two Worlds (#3)

xxii. Lost Time

A gentle breeze brushed against my skin, my breath stopping for a moment before I took a deep breath, inhaling the crisp air, the scent of a storm's aftermath filling my nostrils. I peered over the balcony's edge, looking down at everything that mattered to me, a woven tapestry of forests and mountains screaming out for me to return. Silhouettes of my dragons flying throughout my lands only made the longing to be out there worse. I could only take being trapped in the castle for so long.

From behind me, the door opened and footsteps neared closer until whoever it was stood beside me, but I didn't have to look to know who it was. I sat up straight, inhaling sharply as I spoke.

"You're back already?" I said, still keeping my eyes forward. Yoongi sighed and sat on the bench beside me, his back pressed up against the railing and his eyes grazing across my features.

"Yeah. She's asleep," Yoongi sighed, his gaze lowering as he leaned back slightly, his body relaxing as he took a deep breath of the humid air. "I just laid with her for a few minutes and she fell asleep quickly."

"Mei's been having a lot of nightmares lately. I'm glad you're there to comfort her since I can't." Sighing, I leaned back into the wheelchair, resting my arms against the rests on either side of me, my fingers gripping at the cold iron handles on the end of each chair arm.

Despite being in the wheelchair for a week now, I was still nowhere near used to it, nor was I willing to get used to it. As soon as Axel and Tashi give me the okay, I'll burn this chair so I'll never have to be reminded of these memories again. The feeling of being grounded and physically incapable of doing anything.

"Dammit, I hate this thing," I huffed, lightly hitting the wheelchair's arms in frustration.

"Just another week and you'll never have to use it again, okay? Just a week," Yoongi assured, but I couldn't help but roll my eyes at his misplaced optimism.

"You do know there's a chance I won't be able to walk again, right? It's stupid to think otherwise."

"I'm just trying to look on the bright side-" Yoongi said, trying to place his hand on my knee when I wheeled back a foot, away from his touch with a scowl on my face.

"The bright side? There is no bright side in this situation. Things have changed since you left. You know nothing."

Yoongi looked as if he were wincing, but instead he quietly retracted his hand and twisted his body around, looking over the platform's railing and out to the horizon, watching outlines of dragons flying across the sky.

"The only thing that's changed is you," Yoongi mumbled.

"I've never changed. I'm a monster. I always have been. I just don't try to hide it anymore. They made me this way," I said, glaring at Yoongi from the corner of my eyes when he suddenly turned back around, his eyes glistening with moisture and a pained expression painted across his face.

"What happened to you? What made you so scared to stay still long enough to let someone in?" Yoongi questioned.

"You happened." My heart screeched to a halt as the words slipped out of my mouth before I could even realize what I was saying, and the wounded expression Yoongi displayed afterwards didn't exactly lessen the impact of the realization of my words. In fact, I was carrying even more guilt upon my shoulders than before.

With a sigh, I closed my eyes, already feeling them starting to well up with tears, but I knew I couldn't cry in front of Yoongi. I couldn't show weakness now.

"I'm not the person I want to be-" I began.

"I don't care about that, Maya. I want us to go back to the way we were. That's all I want," Yoongi interrupted, scooting to the edge of the bench and moving as close to me as possible.