Olympic National Park // H.S. au

E i g h t e e n

Ten days has passed. Ten damn days and Harry still haven't found his balls and tried to talk to me. He's such a damn coward it almost hurts to think about how much of a coward he really is. What is his problem? I've tried to look at our 'situation' in every possible perspective and still I haven't found a reason. Even if he was just in it for the chase, it wouldn't make sense. If that was the case, then he would have tried harder to get into my pants. Harry is like this major puzzle you had at your grandma's with a thousand pieces and even though you tried solving it every holiday you would never fix it. He's so damn difficult and unsolvable.

What is it about him though? He called his mother his "biological mother" which you wouldn't really do if it wasn't because you had more than one mother role. Besides that, he has a bad reputation in the city, meaning he's not afraid to burn a few cars nor throw a punch. Why is he so angry? What has made him into this troubled man he is today? I hate how curious I am and how it attracts me to him. He's like books that ends with an open ending and leave you frustrated.

The teachers have decided for us to go home tomorrow morning since we aren't doing anything and I honestly couldn't be happier. I feel like one of those little irish fellas at the end of the rainbow with their pot of gold. These past ten days have flooded together, all of them being the same. We would get up, eat, look at Chloe clinging to Harry, read, draw and paint pictures and look at Harry and Chloe kissing. It's not that I'm jealous, not at all, but I just find Harry extremely gross. He told me Chloe and him weren't a thing, kissed me multiple times and then went back to Chloe. He's such a gentleman.

Throwing the last piece of clothing into my bag, I finish off my packing. I don't want to think about Harry more for tonight, all I want to do is get a good, solid night sleep and then go home early tomorrow and forget about him. Part of me is on cloud nine to go see Stephen, but the other part of me is also dreading it because I know I have to talk to him about me and Harry's encounters. Sure, I could just go ahead and never tell him about it and live happily ever after, but I simply can't do that. I can't kiss another man and be disrespectful against him and then at least not tell him. He deserves more than that.

I sigh and sit down on my bed, it being the only thing I haven't packed down yet. I have no idea how Stephen will react to my confession, but deep down I think he'll forgive me. Our love is too precious to throw away over a few kisses. Stephen is the one I'll marry one day and live with for the rest of my life, not Harry. Hell, I've only known Harry for three weeks besides hearing rumors about him in the city. I could never imagine marrying him, especially because of how rude and mean he is.

As I lay down and tuck myself into bed, my mind goes back to Stephen. I have to confront Harry once we get home. Even though he may hurt my feelings by saying hurtful stuff along the lines of never wanting to kiss and tell about me, I have to make sure his mouth is sealed closed. The thought of our little affair slipping out in the town and making a fool out of Stephen make me sick to my stomach. How could I ever be so stupid? What if my mother found out? Her friends? They would all label me as a cheating slut - not that I could ever blame them.

It's not until loud sobs escape my mouth that I notice the warm, salty liquid running down my cheeks. I have to make this right, I just have. Rubbing the tears off of my face, I dive my face into my pillow and try to muffle up my sobs. Closing my eyes, I prepare myself for whatever challenges that will face me tomorrow.

Moving beside of me and indiscreet talking is what wakes me up. I reach up and run my index finger's knuckle along my lower lash line to remove my crumbled mascara. Carly and Jayce are busy packing, throwing things into their bags. I haven't spoken much to any of them. They apologized a few days ago again, and we've gradually started talking more and more - just nok as much as before. It's weird not having them as close as before, but I think it'll go away once we're back and not around each other 24/7.