Inside Those Eyes

The Promise

"Where were you guys? Me, the kitchen staff, even Richard and the boys, have been looking for you guys for hours." Liam says, obviously hurt and not doing a good job at hiding it either.

"I'm sorry Liam, I should have told you. Harry invited me to one of my family gatherings so we went together."

"And that lasted all night?" He argues. But luckily Harry comes to my defense.

"By the time we were done it was late into the night, so we decided to just stay at my mom's house. She just slept in the guestroom."

Liam looks to me for confirmation. "Yeah, we were really tired and weren't up for the long drive back." His face is filled with relief and complete trust. How did I just lie like that?

"Well, I'm glad you're okay, I was just worried. You know what lengths some people will go to get celebrities' attention." So basically while I was out with Harry, Liam was pacing the floor thinking that some crazy fan had abducted me, just to get to him. He embraces me and I feel the guilt from me and Harry's relationship flood my heart.

"I'm not feeling that great from the long drive out here cause I get carsick pretty easily. I'll be up in my room if anyone needs me." I excuse myself from the conversation and quickly ascend the stairs, trying to flee from the two cages that keep my heart captive.

I sprint the last ten feet to my room, hastily closing the door behind me and throwing myself upon my bed. How did my life get to be such a mess?

I don't get much time to let it all sink in before Princess Pumpkin jumps up on me with a loud "Mrrow!" reminding me that she has not been fed. I momentarily forget about my troubles and put some food in her dish with a slight bow, she will never let you forget that she is the queen of cuteness.

I go back to bed and let reality press upon my very being until I cannot tell where I start and my troubles begin. When I try to make sense of my feelings I only get more tangled in the slowly constricting mess, because nothing I can explain, I've never felt anything close to what I feel for Harry and Liam. I grab the covers and shove them over my limp body, trying to shut out the world, but it just causes me to hyperventilate. I can feel the sheets cutting off my lungs, I can feel me drowning in the water of my own guilt and confusion. I throw the covers off and run out of my room, trying to find air and a solution. Blindly I lead myself down random halls and passageways, looking for an answer and only getting myself more lost.

Eventually I give up as I find myself in a tiny room used just for storage. I discover a place to hide among some dusty furniture that hasn't been touched for years and stay there, huddled up for hours.

Sleep comes to my exhausted, emotionally strained body. In the dream that ensues I find myself in a misty nothingness. The pasty-white fog surrounding me clears, revealing a red flower in a little vase. I walk up to it and hesitantly put my hand out to touch its deep-red petals. Before I can, a bright light shines above me, wilting the beautiful flower. A gust of wind blows what's left of the blossom away, and I run after it; the bloom seems to have become the object of all my desires. I reach what I perceive to be a gray swamp, which the flower lands in, out of my reach. For some reason unknown to me, I feel as if I should go to rescue the sinking blossom. I step into the murky water and slowly make my way towards it. I can feel myself sinking deeper and deeper with each step, and by the time I reach the bloom I can barely stick my head above the sticky liquid substance. I grasp hold of the flower, but quickly lose my grip as it grows roots and shoots high up into the sky. Looking above me, I can see the top; something is calling me to get there. I climb the twisting stem, surprisingly ignoring my fear of heights. The now huge flower is so gigantic that when I reach the top I can easily fit my whole body on one petal. I now feel satisfied and let out a breath, my eyes begin to focus and things just look clearer. It is then that I notice a note in the center of the flower's bud. I reach for it but before I can pick it up, I am awakened by someone talking.