Why is my life not like a watt pad novel?

Dem boys dough

Okay, first off, I love watt pad. Hell, I'd even go as far as to say I have an unhealthy obsession.
Unfortunately, this unhealthy obsession has led to some unhealthy expectations, particularly about-you guessed it- guys!
So, I was reading a run of the mill, mediocre watt pad teen novel( again! My life is sooo exciting!), you know the type, when I stumbled upon the horrific realization that-gasp- there are no bad boys, hot guys, stalker guys, football guys( does anyone even play football in Canada?), nice guys, or admirers in my life. Nor are there vampires or werewolves. Mind you, I am not complaining about those last two.
I have barely any guy friends at all in my boring life! The only people who have liked me romantically were girls- and I don't swing that way.
This is not necessarily a bad thing, I am after all a teenager and most non-platonic relationships I develop in high school will almost certainly be obliterated by university. My motto, no boyfriend no problem, is something I stand by.
So why does the heroine in these novels always have a minimum of three conquestees, one of whom inevitably turns out to be her soulmate and the love of her life, no matter how ugly/stupid/nerdy/bitchy she thinks she is?
I am a fairly average girl. My life is bat-shit crazy, but then isn't everyone's?
So where are my hunky admirers?
After I read this story I was left wondering if everybody's life was much more exciting than mine. Was everybody actually at a huge secret party with booze in red cups and cheating boyfriends and friends who leave you to drive with the cocky badass sweetheart? Was I missing something? Or were these authors smokin somethin good?
In conclusion, I am angry at these cliché stories because I think they give us all a completely unrealistic idea of what high school is like. There will not be hot guys declaring everlasting love to you left and right, there is no horrible mean popular slutty girl who will hate you for no reason, and girl, there is no way you can make that uniform look sexy.
That's why it pisses me off. Not because I want a badass boyfriend or anything. Hehe.
He.
Totally.
Next up... Why watt pad girls are not actually all that average.