Hospital For Souls

Chapter 9

I had lost the one girl who made me want to live again to start over, she treated me like no one else in my life had as if someone like me deserved that. I had treated her the same. The girl I fell in love with wasted her energy just to save me. Now she's gone. It's all gone. I guess It's true what some people say then, there's no happy endings. Or maybe just not for people like me. 

These thoughts raced through my mind, each painful, sweet memory I had of her began to stab and torture my heart in a million different ways. I felt so broken. I had no meaning without her. Cause before I met her and  before I died. I was a monster, an awful person. If only I had met her sooner maybe I wouldn't have died and maybe then she would have changed me. We both would be alive and we could be together.

I wandered the streets. The thing about being a fucked up person before dying, is that hardly anyone comes to your funeral, but when you do come back from the dead people wont care if your alive. The few people that came to your funeral either turned their life around and wouldn't want you near them to drag them back down again or they are still fuck ups that met the same fate. Death. 

When you fuck up so badly for so long, people do give up easily and most of the time there are no second chances. It's the cold hard truth and I knew it. There was no place for me to go, no body who would bother to take me into their home. If there was anyone left.

 A familiar feeling crept up and washed over me. That's when days went by that I couldn't even count. I spent many nights hiding in a shitty place and relapsing on heroin, i started to drink heavily too. When I shot up the heroin I felt happy. It was amazing. 

I walked around a park on a rainy afternoon, I sat down on a bench under a tree and watched the world around me. I saw a couple holding hands. I wonder what they lost along the way before finding each other I thought to myself, how crazy their story on how they met must be. I smiled a little.

 Everything reminded me of her. She's everywhere. I needed her more than I ever needed anybody and I know she needed me just the same. I'm so lost without her. I've never felt so alone or lost before till I saw the light in her go out. Now I'm worried cause I haven't found her ghost yet.

I visited the place where I first heard her voice, when I first saw her beautiful face. "Here I am again. This time I am alive...and your not here with me, Love.." I spoke as I walked up to the tree and sat in the same spot I once had before. This time it was different...so different.

I felt the wind pick up and leaves started blowing. I looked up at the dark sky, feeling a rain drop hit the side of my face as more and more stabbed my skin making me shiver. I slowly drifted off to sleep. 

Oliver.

I woke up to hear someone say my name softly. A voice I was sure I heard before. I woke up and looked around. I saw her and my heart skipped a beat. I hoped this wasn't a dream, that it was real. I got up and walked towards her.

"Iris" I called out her name as she was walking away. I ran after her calling out her name. I ran after her through the woods, branches scraping against my skin as I ran past them. I almost tripped a few times. Damn these lanky ass legs I told myself. She ran across a road to the other side which had another wooded area. "Follow me, Oliver" she pleaded in a soft faded voice.

I ran across the road. I felt a sudden impact of pain on the side of my body that quickly rushed through my whole entire body, the ground becoming closer and closer as my vision darkened. unable to move I whispered her name but it never escaped from my lips. 

I saw two lights beam above my head, hearing a door slam as I saw a shadow of someone hovered over me. "Oh my god, call 911!!" they shouted to somebody else. My eyes slowly shut and everything went black as I could have sworn a soft voice yelled my name in the distance.

All at once memories good and bad from my past had flashed in my mind.