It's pouring outside, but I let the raindrops soak in my hair and splash against my cold face.
The loud patter of the rain against the streets drown out my footsteps and anything I whisper to myself. I pull open the door to the bar and run another hand through my tangled, wet hair. The bar is mostly empty except for the workers that are obvious a bit tipsy.
The sound of shattering glass catches my attention.
And I meet the blue eyes that I detest the most.
I try to ignore his presence, but he's already wearing a lopsided grin with droopy, red eyes. I shout for a beer over Blue's loud, obnoxious chatter and the bartender nods his head. I pull out three dollars and slide it over the counter. I bite my bottom lip with rage and try to restrain myself from biting Blue's head off. But he keeps shouting to the bartender that he's deeply sorry about the shot glass, and he gets on his fours and picks on the pieces glass, asking the inanimate object if it hurts too much. I dig my nails into my palms until they begin to bleed.
It's raining; I need my drink.
Finally, the bartender comes over with my beer, and Blue appears beside me with the widest grin on his pale lips and then immediately curls into a frown. He runs his hand through his already messy hair, and takes another swing of his bottle of velvety poison. I want him to leave. I haven't seen him for over a week. I've calmed down, my thoughts have. I was living like before, but he came and ruined it, all over again.
"Tippy, I got the feeling that you don't really like me, hate me even. But I got that the first day - no, first moment - we met."
I keep my face neutral, giving nothing away. His stentorian voice is now dull and low, and he's beginning to slur his words. I want nothing more than to get up and leave him in the air, but something keeps me seated and I just know I'm not moving anytime soon .
"But it finally hit me at the park nine days ago... I keep counting the days, you know, I keep counting nine days of torture and doleful nights. In nine nights, I've only slept five hours... I don't know what happened. I'm so messed up right now. My friends won't even talk to me; my mum is looking at me with such disappointment in her eyes, and my father scolds at me at any given moment... Do you see what you did to me, Tippy? Are you fucking satisfied? Are you happy now that you made me miserable? You destroyed me with that empty look in your eyes and the daggers you shoot at me. You destroyed me with that soft voice of yours. You're the reason I reek with smoke and alcohol; you're the reason for my restless nights. And for some unknown reason, I can't get you out of my fucking mind."
I just leave.
I will not just sit there and let him blame me for his mistakes. I wanted to strangle him and watch real pain in his eyes. I am no excuse for him. And I swear, if I see him again I will truly destroy him and make him feel a pain he never felt before.
I gulp down my beer as the rain hits my body. Once the bottle is empty, I smash it against the ground. And some how, I don't know how, the palm of my hand begins to bleed from a whole new cut. I curse under my breath and let the rain wash away the blood.
I need to escape from all this Blue shit.
