euphoric (n.s. AU)

t w e n t y e i g h t

Harry's POV

Niall's phone is gripped in his hand so hard he could crush it, and Marissa is standing in the middle of the room, squinting her eyes in an attempt to read the messages from where she's standing. I have a million things to say, to apologize for, but the words won't come out. This is how I lose Niall. Everything I've done for him won't matter, not anymore; not after what I've done. I know it was wrong of me, I know it was selfish; I told myself a thousand times that it was in Niall's best interest as well as mine, but I knew deep down that it was for my own selfish agenda. He is his own person, with his own thoughts and feelings, and he's able to make decisions for himself. There aren't many things in Niall's life that he has felt in control of, and I took something from him that he did have control over. I watch as Marissa makes her way towards Niall, not being able to read what the small screen says from the distance she was at. He hands her his phone, telling her to scroll up as much as she needs to until she's satisfied, before storming upstairs and slamming our bedroom door behind him. I use the last bit of my energy to stand up from the couch, my legs shaking with every step. Marissa is so immersed in Niall's phone that she doesn't notice my stumbling, which I'm grateful for. My sweaty palm grabs the stair railing and I feel a harsh pain rattle through my head. I almost felt like my headaches had been successfully eradicated upon being with Niall, but I guess not. It's probably from the constant stress of keeping this secret from him. I let out a deep breath in an attempt to calm myself down before ascending the stairs, heading straight for our room.

I stand in front of our bedroom door, my heart racing faster and harder with every passing second. I have to fix things with Niall, I keep telling myself. I have to make things right. I bring my hand up to knock lightly on the door a few times, awaiting an answer. When I don't get one, I knock once more, a little harder this time.

"Fuck off, Harry." Niall mumbles from the other side. I place my ear up to the door, listening intently, trying to see if I can decipher what he's doing. I hear some movement, as if he's walking around, but that's it.

"Baby, please let me explain." I say, jiggling the locked doorknob. The door swings open, revealing a distraught looking Niall.

"I said fuck off!" He yells, slamming the door in my face. I sigh, resting my forehead against the door. I really fucked up this time, and I don't know how to fix it.

"Please Niall. Please let me in." I beg, getting silence in response. I turn around and sit down against the door, resting my head in my hands. My moping is interrupted by Marissa, standing in front of me with Niall's phone still in her hands. She looks down at me with slight pity, before turning her attention to the locked door.

"Niall, I believe you. You were right." She croaks, knocking on the door a few times. There's some movement on the other side before Niall's voice can be heard.

"I'm so glad you believe me."

"Can you let me in, Niall?"

"Only if you promise you're not just saying this to get me to open the door for Harry."

"I promise." She replies, and with that, the door swings open. Marissa walks around me, entering the room before the door shuts again. I press my ear to the door once more, trying to hear their conversation. Marissa apologizes to Niall for doubting him, and tells him that she doesn't want to stop seeing Sean just yet, but that she will be careful and won't allow him to use her. He agrees and says it's a good plan, before asking her if she can take him to dinner instead of me. She agrees, and there's about 5 minutes of small talk before they both emerge from the room.

"We're heading out, Harry." Marissa tells me, turning around to walk down the stairs.

"Where are you going?" I ask Niall, and he doesn't turn around. Instead, he continues descending the stairs, walking straight out of the house. I stand up from my spot on the floor, rushing down the stairs as fast as I can. Marissa is standing at the front door now, blocking me from getting outside.