Nothing Else Matters (Klars)

That clever (annoying) little voice

-Kirk's POV-
*beep beep beep beep*
The annoying high-pitched sound of my alarm clock woke me up. It was 5am on a Monday morning, which meant I had about half an hour to get ready before heading to the recording studio.

Slowly and reluctantly, I lifted my tired body off of my bed, slipped my feet into my comfy warm slippers and tiptoed towards the bathroom, careful not to wake Lani and the kids.
I showered and changed into some new clothes, then hurried out the house.

When I arrived at the studio, James and Robert were already jamming.

"Hey,man! You're late!" James exclaimed as I walked towards them.
I wasn't in the mood to argue, so I changed the subject as rapidly as possible.
"Hey,where's Lars?" I asked.

James and Rob shared a peculiar glance. James shrugged and Rob resumed his bass playing, completely ignoring my question.

I decided it was best not to push it, so I silently walked over to my guitar and began playing along with them.

Lars didn't show up until 4pm. Normally, James would be furious. He would be yelling at Lars, scolding him for not showing up on time and Lars would be yelling right back. That day, this didn't happen.
When Lars walked in, James waved at him and Rob mumbled a quiet "Hello".
Clearly, something was off.

We recorded 10 new songs that day. In all of those songs, my guitar sounded perfect. No, I'm not showing off, it really did sound much better than usual. The drums, however, sounded awful. Again, I decided not to comment on that because I knew it would create a massive shitstorm, and I just couldn't be bothered to handle that.

As I was driving home, I received a phone call from Lars. The beating of my heart quickened and I began to shake slightly. Why am I so nervous? I wondered. I pressed the green button and immediately heard Lars's beautiful voice.

"Hey man, you ok? You seemed a little nervous earlier." He asked me. Normally I would reassure him that I was fine, then hang up, but today, a little voice at the back of my head wanted me to tell the truth. So I did.

"No, actually. I'm worried. Is something going on between you and James?" I said nervously, my voice shaking slightly.
Lars was silent for what seemed like an eternity, then he completely disregarded my question and invited me to his house for dinner. I accepted the invite.
My heart was still racing and I had butterflies in my stomach by the time I reached Lars's house.
Calm down! I told myself, still wondering where this anxiety came from. I had known Lars for over 20 years. Although I had always been madly in love with him, I had never been quite this anxious around him.

When I entered, the house seemed emptier than usual, and Lars confirmed that this was true.

Jessica, Lars's gorgeous wife, was out with friends and Lars's kids were staying with their grandmother.

When he said this, my mind started racing too. I began to have weird thougths of what I could do to him. I started daydreaming about passionately kissing him and touching his wonderfully smooth skin. After all, out wives would never find out. We could keep it a secret forev-

"EARTH TO KIRK!" Lars's yelling brought me back to reality, "I'm going to order Chinese food, is that ok with you?". I nodded briefly and watched Lars make the call. I noticed his perfect princess hair, his shiny eyes, his luscious lips. I noticed how incredibly cute he looked in that moment, and my mind began to wander once again.

Lars slammed down the receiver and flopped down onto the couch. I sat down next to him.
What if I told him I love him right now? Would he be mad? I thought, and there was that little voice at the back of my head again, chanting "Do it! Do it!" Over and over again.

So I did.
"Lars, can I tell you something? You have to keep this a secret from everyone else."
Lars shrugged.
"Sure."
I took a deep breath before uttering the three life changing words,
"I love you".

He was taken aback for a second, then he burst out laughing. He must have  thought I was joking, trying to make him feel uncomfortable.  

My entire body was pretty much vibrating by this point and i felt my heart pounding out of my chest, i was short of breath but that annoying little voice kept urging me to clarify that this wasn't a joke.

"I'm not joking. I really do love you, Lars." I clarified, "I've been madly in love with you for the past 20 years".  Lars was becoming hysterical, laughing and crying and barely breathing.  The voice was getting frustrated now, so I grabbed Lars's shoulders and held him still. I forced him to look me in the eyes as I made one last attempt to convince him that i was being serious:

"Dude, listen to me, I'm not joking." My voice was trembling so much that i could barely speak but i forced myself to continue anyway, " I love you, Lars...I'm sorry" I was struggling to hold back tears.
He scanned my eyes to make sure I wasn't lying. He looked as if he was holding back tears too. Then, all of a sudden, his expression changed from one of sadness to one of extreme frustration.

"You have to get out. Now." He yelled, as he grabbed my arm and practically threw me out of his front door.