Luke Hemmings imagines

Save me

dear luke,
I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore. I love you so much, and as much as I want to stay and spend the rest of my life with you, I can't. I just can't handle this pain anymore. I've held on for so long, and I can't do it anymore. I'm so sorry, baby. once I'm gone, you might be a bit sad for a month or two, but then you'll get used to it. you'll find a girl who's not depressed and has suicidal thoughts running through her head every single day. you two will be so happy together.
once again, I'm sorry. I love you.
love, [Y/N]
You sniffled as you finished writing the note, not even bothering to wipe away your tears since you knew that there will be more tears escaping your eyes. You got up from the couch and walked into Luke's bedroom, placing the tear stained note on his side table along with a few old notes that you wrote earlier just in case the time has come; and it did. You slowly leaned down and kissed Luke's cheek, but being careful not to wake him up. You covered your mouth as a sob was about to escape, and quickly, but quietly, walked out of the room. You let your tears escape freely and walked out of the house, walking over to yours. It was only five to seven minutes away.
Once you got there, you unlocked the door and walked in, going upstairs to your bedroom. You took out the bottle of pills that you hid in one of your drawers, and opened it, pouring out the pills into your hand. You looked down at them, feeling numb, yet so scared. But you also felt like you were finally going to be free; free from the pain, from the depression, from the dark thoughts, from seeing your reflection and thinking about how bad you looked and wonder why even Luke liked you in the first place. All the bad thoughts about life and yourself ran through your head, and you couldn't handle it anymore. Tears were streaming down your face and you were shaking as you slowly brought your hand up to swallow the pills.
That's it.
It's the end.
You're finally going to be free from everything.
You closed your eyes and opened your mouth to swallow the pills, but then you heard the front door open downstairs and Luke call out your name. You quickly stopped and got up, walking over to your bedroom door to close and lock it. You were about to close it, but Luke stuck his feet in between the door and the doorframe, stopping you. "No, [Y/N], stop! Please!" he pleaded you in a shaky voice; you could tell that he was crying and he probably ran all the way from his house to yours.
"Leave, Luke!" you sobbed out, trying to close the door but you couldn't since he kept his foot there. Eventually, he pushed the door open, grabbed your fist and opened it, causing you to drop the pills to the floor as you cried. "Go away, Luke, please. Leave!"
"No, [Y/N], stop! You promised that you wouldn't do it!"
"Well, I'm sorry, but I'm breaking my promise. I can't stay anymore. I can't live anymore. You don't understand. Every breath hurts; every breath feels like it's burning, I can't handle living anymore," you looked up at him as you spoke, your whole body was shaking. All you wanted to do was swallow the pills right now, but you couldn't because he was there.
He shook his head and wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest. You wanted to fight back, but you felt so weak. You just wanted to die already; you wanted to leave this terrible world, but he wouldn't let you. "Please, Luke, let me go," you sobbed into his chest. He tightened his grip around you, still speaking in a shaky voice, "No, [Y/N], I won't let you go. I love you more than you could ever imagine, and I don't ever want you to leave. If I didn't wake up and find the note, you could've been dead right now, and just the thought of you not being alive anymore hurts more than anything else. Please, [Y/N], don't leave. Don't try to do it again. Please, please, please..." he pleaded, his last words turning into whispers. You didn't want to promise him and tell him that you won't try it again, because you knew that you will try it one day. All you did right now was cry into his chest as he held you tightly.