Big Book Of Sjips One Shots

Rejected (S)

TW: Angst

I had grown tired of hiding everything I've ever felt, and even though I cherished our friendship, I was ready to put it on the line for the one chance I had. The man in blue had slowly worked his way into my heart with his quick wit and easy going attitude. He relied on me to pick up his slack and I was more than willing to do so.

On the outside, I made sure to give him all my attention and all my friendship, but on the inside, I wanted to give him so much more. We spent so much time together, it would be almost impossible not to develop deeper feelings, at least, It was almost impossible for me. Him, on the other hand, could rise above it and feel almost no attachment at all.

I understood that it was no shot against me. He wasn't obligated to develop an attachment, anymore than I was forced to fall in love with him, and yet, I couldn't accept it. My broken heart refused to let go as he turned away, my voice shaking uncontrollably, "Can't you just pretend?"

He stopped almost immediately, letting my words sink in. My confession had been easily rejected, but now I was just going too far. He turned back, looking me straight in the eye, confusion written all over his face. "Pretend?... You mean go against how I really feel to make you feel better?..."

Now, I was not okay. I had been rejected nicely, but still rejected nonetheless. It was clear that I had almost nothing to lose, so i'd try anything to turn my luck around. "Yes..."

"That's pathetic." He said, as I felt my heart break further. Clear disgust appeared on his face, as he could not believe I had the gall to suggest a thing "Even if I could somehow fake it, I would never do that to you. You're my friend, and always will be, but that's all I can offer you. I'm sorry, Sjin, but I can't feel the same as you."

Even though I still understood he was trying his best to let me down easy, it couldn't fix the pain in my chest. As I watched him walk away, I fell to my knees overcome by grief. It was only when I felt a warm softness against my back, did I realize how how cold I was.

Shaking and crying, I came to realize the warmth belonged to Nilesy who had accidentally overheard everything, "It'll be okay, Sjin. Please don't cry."

"Nilesy..." I tried so hard not to cry, but with him comforting me, it was all spilling out, "I think I screwed up..."

"No." His voice was shaking underneath his reassuring tone, "It'll be okay. You'll be alright."

"Will it?" I asked, tears still streaming down my face. "I don't think it will be."

"Nonsense," He said, squeezing me tightly. "I've never seen someone so brave. Everything will be fine, I promise. How about you come home with me for now? I'd hate for you to be alone."

Tears still streamed down my face, but I was happy he showed up when he did, "Thank you, Nilesy. I would hate to be alone too."

Credit to Blackrock_soldier on ao3