I guess, its hard to do.... Moving on is, in my case. It was painful, but once you pass it, it feels like your at ease. I do see him everyday, because I am forced to. His brother's appearance towards me just makes it worse. I realize that I am running out of time. He's leaving me. He said this was the only opportunity he could get. I was happy for him, but it was hard to see him leave. He would probably be gone for 5 years, knowing he wants to be a doctor. It was hard watching him go. I could see him slipping away. A few more months till it happens. The pain will go away. If you want to move on, you have to distant your self from him. To distant your feelings you have to delete everything that reminds you of him. Once you see him again, the pain will begin but go away in a flash. That's how you know you've moved on. If you see him again, hear his calming voice, and his gestures once again from a long time and it doesn't hurt you; congratulations you have moved on. This is what it will be like.
I looked up upon him as he sat on a sturdy tree branch. He was doing something. I know, he's just studying. He's always studying. All he wants to do is study. I sat below the tree on a bench. It was calming. The sun set upon the summer sun, making the breeze wave. I took out my sketch book, drawing the view I had of him. The branch holding him in the air, as he looked down at his paper. I sketched until the picture satisfied me.
Was I about to call out to him? No
Was I going to say something to catch his attention? Not a chance.
You know why? It is because I'm still scared and hurt. Smiling is my cover. Pretending to be happy is helping. Just pretending to be happy, will trick your brain. It won't trick the side of your heart that is broken, but will trick the side of your heart that is intact. The thing is, you rarely feel the side of your heart that cannot be fixed. You can feel it throb once something hurts you. His smile, his laugh, his walk. It throbs. His focus attention, his intelligence. It throbs. Just remind yourself of the things he has done to hurt you, then your emotions will change from sad to angry.
I finally finished my drawing. From the beginning of when I got here, I thought he truly noticed be. Not a chance. So what did I do?
I pretend to be happy and friendly. I walked away....... forever.
YOU ARE READING
The Day I Remembered(Reader x Yukio)
Fiksi PenggemarTo overcome her fears, and find her abilities she must work on this with the Okumura brothers. Her memories of the past flourish away, considering how calm and collected she is. Forgetting who she is, and how much power she had, is a tragedy from th...
