The Cliff That Changed Everything

Chapter 11

"Sometimes you have to get rid of all the bullsh*t in your life and just focus on the things that make you a better person."

 Dean had arrived; I had told my parents that he would be coming round. It was already dark outside so my parents wanted him to stay over, but he insisted that he would manage the walk home easily. I led him upstairs to my room as soon as he arrived. He closed the door to my room behind me and sat on my bed.

"Sooo..." I said.

"Yeah, I guess, I came here to tell you."

"You did, so get on with it!"

"Yeah I suppose." He grabbed my hand and held it tightly as he looked into my eye

"Go on..."

"Holly! Do I have to?" He said, resting our hands on his laps as he shuffled towards me.

"Yes, you do."

"Your parents are gonna kill me for this." He shuffled slightly towards me again, until our heads were almost touching. "You have lovely eyes, a beautiful Hazel colour." He said as he peered into them. In that moment, I forgot about everything; where I was, Badger, Steve, my dad, the new baby. It was just me and Dean alone in this world. I wanted to kiss him. Would he softly kiss me? Or ferociously with tongues and everything? Would he lean into me and be the leader? Or would he let me control? Where would his hands be? In my hair? Gripping my face? Or perhaps just lifelessly hanging beside him?

Dean looked away, unclasped his hands and shuffled further back as he started to blush. Did he want to do the same thing to me?

I broke the un-comfortable silence between us, "just tell me!"

Dean coughed awkwardly, "Holly... F*ck. F*ck. F*ck. F*ck. Sh*t. Well basically...  oh wow I don't know how to say this but. You're going to deny this and probably hit me and get mad and go on a hissy fit and cry for days. But just to let you know, I'll always be here for you, and I'm absolutely appalled that I'm the one who has to tell you this... but I think my decision is right, you deserve to know everything and I am so sorry. Badger was your Dad."

 Wait, what? Is this kid on drugs?

Impossible. Grandad was alive. Step-Grandad actually. No... 'STEP.'

I slowly stood up, I was angry, very angry, ferociously angry. I needed to escape, run away as far as I could from this horrible place. How could my mum lie to me after all these years? Dean shot up, and grabbed my arm as I tried to run away.

No, no, no, it's not true, it's not true, it's not true, it can't be. It has to be some sort of sick lie! "You're lying!" I screamed, before I bit Dean's arm and he let go of me in pain.

I raced downstairs.

"Is it true!" I shouted as I burst into the living room where my whole family sat watching TV.

"Is what true!?" Steve asked as Mum turned off the TV.

"Dad's dead, he committed suicide? Is it true?"

No one answered.

"You little f*cking b*tch is it true? Have you lied to me stupid b*itch? Have you f*cking lied to me all this time?" I spat.

Mum stood up, she was ready to protest but Steve stopped her. "It's time Kate. It's time she knows the truth about her dad."

Mum burst in to tears, as did Bax. "We wanted to tell you all, particularly you Holly but..."

"BUT NOTHING! YOU'VE LIED TO ME FOR SO MANY YEARS! I always hoped he'd come back or I'd be able to see him! You gave me false hopes, I HATE YOU ALL! YOU KNOW WHAT MUM, I'M YOUR DAUGHTER. I'M YOUR F*CKING DAUGHTER. AND I WISH YOU HAD KILLED YOURSELF INSTEAD OF DAD".