Fucked up world

20) The Funeral

I threw on my plain black dress that reached just above my knees, some black tights, black converse, and my plain black hoodie. I brushed my hair and left my make up.

Scarlett had just woke up and looked at me with a sympathetic look. I looked away and put my phone, iPod, earphones, inhaler and some tissues in the front of a bag, and went upstairs to grab the kids. They were already awake and giggly.

I threw some spare clothes and nappies in the bag, and pulled Phoenix out first to dress him. I put on black skinny jeans, a white shirt, and his black and white vans.

"Mama!" He cried happily. I gave him a sad smile as I picked him up and hugged him.

"You ok Sky?" Nate asked at the doorway. I nodded, not looking at him as I put Phoenix in his crib and started dressing Charlie in a black dress and her black and white vans. I brushed her hair too.

"Can you grab Phoenix please?" I asked him quietly. Nate nodded and picked him up. Nate was wearing black skinny jeans, a black shirt, a black tie, a black blazer, and all black vans.

I picked Charlie up and their bag and brought her downstairs and fed her, Nate feeding Phoenix.

"Do you want something to eat kids?" Jinxx asked us. I shook my head.

"Sky, you've hardly eaten over the last week." Sammi told me.

"Yeah, I know." I replied emotionlessly. When Charlie was done I took her bib off. Riley came down matching Nate, except he was wearing a white shirt. Jinxx was wearing the same as Nate, and Sammi was wearing a long black dress.

"The guys are gonna meet us there." Jinxx told me, picking Charlie up for me. I nodded and we all walked in silence to the church.

There wasn't many people. There was us, Andy, Juliet, Alex, Felicity, Jake, Ella, James, Jacob, Ashley, CC, Oli, Ethan, Holly, Nicholas, Eve, Jayy, Leda and Tobias.

I hugged them all when I saw them, but still no words were spoken, just sullen faces. I looked away when I saw Holly's tiny baby bump.

An ambulance pulled up and Becca came out with her machines, as I learned she had cancer, along with a paramedic and who I was guessing was her mother.

"Hey, I didn't know if you could make it." I smiled at her slightly.

"It took a lot to convince the doctor because I'm supposed to rest, so I'm only aloud for the funeral." She replied. I nodded.

"Thanks for coming." I smiled, she smiled back. You could tell her chemo had started because chunks of her blond hair was missing, but it didn't seem to faze her.

The hearse pulled up with Zander's tiny coffin. The men pulled it out and carried it into the church. I felt someone's hand in mine and looked up to see Nate. He nodded encouragingly as we all filed into the church.

Me, Nate, Eve, Jinxx, Sammi, Scarlett and Riley sat at the front.

"We are gathered here today to say farewell to Zander Miles Ferguson and to commit him into the hands of God." Charlie was sat on my lap staring intently at the priest as he talked without saying a word or making a noise. Phoenix on the other hand was being surprisingly quiet, but he was extremely fidgety.

Soon enough people were going up to say something. Nate went up first.

"Um, well, I don't know what to say. Zander, was a good kid, he felt like a son, even though I'm only eighteen. He was a kid full of innocence with a smile that was contagious. It's sad to know that he will never get a full life. Never learn to walk, Learn and make friends, go to school, fall in love. It was taken away from him too soon and he didn't deserve it. I love you Zander, sleep tight little man." He said, tearing up at the end. He spoke the last line quietly as he sat back down.