The Animal Inside Him (A BBRae fanfiction)

Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I no own Teen Titans.....

Beastboy's Pov

I just told Raven about finding my parents dead. She probably thinks that was the worst of it, but it wasn't. Not in the least. I've done horrible things. Horrible things that i'm not proud of. Sometimes I wish I could've died that day instead of my parents. Can I really tell Raven everything?

There is so much in my life that I've could've stopped, changed, or done better. I never had the guts. They say that suicide is the coward's way out, but I accepted that fact a long time ago. They say the fourth time's the charm, so I guess I'll find out. It will have to be after I tell Raven everything, though, I at least owe her that much.

I roll up my sleeve and gaze upon my arms. So many scars and  burns rest upon it. Inflicted by my enemies as well as self-inflicted. I pick up the knife off my desk again. As I drag the blade across my wrist  I think about a pair of dark blue eyes that seem to stare right through me. They have a cold and unforgiving hardness to them that seem to pierce me straight to my heart. When I die I will be leaving those eyes behind forever, but it's clearly for the best. Being with me would be torture for her. So I don't want to be selfish and listen to my petty feelings. I should've never kissed her like that.

I fall back on my bed and fall into the depressing darkness that is my dreamland.

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"A little boy with green skin, eyes, and hair sits alone crying on the bank of a violent river. the debris of a damaged riverboat lies scattered through the surrounding water. The Boy's uncle stands afar watching him with a small smirk gracing his face.

"Why Garfield, child, What's the matter?" He asks in a concerned voice.

"Mama and Papa were on that boat.......Do you think they might've made it?" He asks naively.

"Maybe...Why don't you go check?"

So at that the small boy stood up and waddled until he reached the bottom of the waterfall.

"MOMMY;DADDY!!!!!" He called as loud as his voice would allow him.

But, alas, they did not answer him.

Instead he found them. Dead. In a loving embrace that showed the courage they held within their hearts knowing they were going to die. They were bloody and cuts were bleeding all over their bodies. His Mother's eyes stared right at him in a glassy stone hard gaze that chilled him straight to the bone. 

"Don't Cry, Just don't cry." He repeatedly told himself as his tears fell in floods down his face

But what he didn't know was that that would be the lat time he would ever cry.

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I awoke in a cold sweat. The memories of my past flooding every pore of my body.

"Just Great, This is exactly what I needed!!!"