Stockholm Syndrome

No Control

A few weeks had passed since I'd hurt my knee, and just like Dr. Hanks had said my knee healed up just fine. Today was my last appointment with him, not that I really needed one, but Max wanted to make sure that I got one last examination now that my knee was healed. Just to be safe, he said.

It was weird how we'd been getting along lately. I mean, there was the occasional spat, but nothing like when I was first brought here. He hadn't hurt me since Charlie's party, which had been a while ago. I bit my lip, trying to calculate how long I'd actually been here.

I closed my eyes and sighed, trying to remember what the paps had yelled at me when Max and I were at the zoo. I know one of them said something about how long I'd been gone... I just needed to remember... which really a difficult task was when management had taught us to just ignore everything the paparazzi said to us. I had to try though, so I let out another deep breath trying to recall the memory...

"Hey Niall, where have you been the past two months?"

"Can you answer some questions?"

"Niall any words on your hiatus from the public view?"

"Where have you been? Vacation?"

"C'mon, Niall!"

Two months... two months since I'd been taken when Max and I went to the zoo. I opened my eyes, staring at the ceiling fan of my room as its blades spun around as I laid on my bed. The light breeze ruffled my hair, but not enough to mess it up. Two months seemed like a long time, but I knew it was actually even longer than that now, because of the time that had passed while my knee healed. If I added those weeks... I'd been gone a little over three months.

Three months... three months that I'd lived with Max. What about my plan to escape? After things fell apart with Ed I hadn't tried anything else... but I hadn't given up. I hated Max, so I definitely hadn't given up. I was still going to save Louis and get back to my mates. I didn't know how, but I was still going to.

But haven't you given up? You don't even have a plan, and you've been saying the same thing since the beginning. When? When are you going to leave? You've had several opportunities... At the zoo you could have caused a public scene. No, it wouldn't have helped Louis, but you could have gone to the police. Someone could have helped. You could have linked Tom to Max. Someone would eventually find Louis. You could have done something... When the doctor was here, you two where alone, you could have told him. He could have called the police after he left, and Max would be none the wiser. You could have escaped, if you really wanted to... A voice in the back of my mind whispered, sending chills down my spine.

The voice was right, I'd had several chances, but I'd missed them. If I really wanted to escape, I could have. So why hadn't I? Why hadn't I tried harder? Tears pricked my eyes as I closed them, my chest rising and falling rapidly.

Why?

I couldn't answer that question. Was it because Max was finally treating me like a human being? I mean... yeah, he'd helped me when I'd hurt my knee, but that wasn't why. I hated him, at least that's what I told myself. I couldn't possibly want to stay here, locked away from the rest of the world. I wasn't living in reality. Watching Netflix, lounging around the pool, playing guitar... those weren't things you did with someone you hated. Those where things that you were supposed to do with your mates. Yet I was doing them with Max. The only rational conclusion I could come to was that I was bored. I only did those things because they gave me something to do.

But maybe what I was doing wasn't rational at all. Maybe it couldn't be rationalized. I mean, Max and Tom had kidnapped Lou and I! That wasn't something that sane people did, so Max and Tom were insane. That's why... but no, I thought as I shook my head. That still didn't make much sense. Their insanity would affect their behavior, but not mine. Something else was causing me to act like this.

I sat up, running a hand through my hair as I tried to clear my head. Maybe I could, no, I would talk to Dr. Hanks about this when he came over later this afternoon. I wasn't going to let Max, or my fear, keep controlling me. It was time I started to take control of what was happening in my life.

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So I know this is super short. It's fragmented and broken. I know. I did this on purpose, to show a shift of Niall's feelings about what is happening. So please don't hate me for the short chapter!

QUESTION OF THE DAY: What's your favorite 1D moment? Was it the video diaries? An interview? A music video? Or perhaps a funny moment  caught on video(Oh No Niall for example)? 

Thank you for reading this my loves! I really do take each read/comment/vote to heart. 

xoxo

IndieChick95