I Can't Go Another Day Without You

What Are You Drinking About?

*Hey! I was planning to post this earlier in the day, but I had a busy schedule, so I'm sorry. I know this isn't the best chapter, but I tried. Hope you enjoy! Thanks.*

Brian silently took a sip from the cold can of Miller Lite that was nestled in his right hand. It felt good to finally relax after their busy and nerve-wracking day. The night had just settled upon them. They could hear the faint sound of the crowd's screams and the words to Luke's Suntan City. They would join him on stage in ten minutes or so to sing a medley of songs with Thompson Square. But as of right then, they were just sitting in the bus, letting the good times roll. Tyler was across from him on the brown leather couch, strumming his guitar. He was nodding his head along with every strum, occasionally stopping to write something down. Neither of them had said much to each other since they entered the bus, but it was comfortable- almost peaceful. At least it was to Brian. It was a good change of pace- the quiet. He needed it. His past couple of months were anything but peaceful. They were torture, if anything. Never had he ever wanted to get back on the road so desperately. He wanted to get away, escape the problems that seemed to be consuming his life. He used to wake up every day with a smile on his face, thankful for the life he was given. Nowadays, he opens his eyes in the morning wishing nothing more than to go back to sleep. To go back to a place where problems didn't exist and where he was happy- truly happy. He could no longer focus on anything. His mind would drift to the memories, only to be replaced with new ones that made him cringe. He missed how things used to be. Simple, perfect- it was the words he used to describe his life. Now, however, he would replace them with confusing and heartbreaking. He knew he'd never forget what he went through- all the emotion trauma that he endured. He wanted to break free, to forget. But as each day came and went he was only left with the painful memories he once loved to think about. He was left with the memory of her. He looked up to the clock on the wall and watched as the hands moved forward slowly with every tick. He wanted to rewind- go back to that day where things went wrong. He wanted to change her mind. But he knew it was too late- she was gone. And what hurt the most, was the fact that she was genuinely happy while he could only pretend. He then looked back to Tyler, who had already been looking at him. That was his best friend right there in front of him. And he had absolutely no idea how bad Brian was hurting inside. He wanted to tell him- he wanted to spill everything. His emotions, his feelings- he wanted to feel happy again. He wanted to get over it and move on. But every time he tried, his mind would only drift back to her. He knew Tyler would help him. He knew he'd try to help him forget. But he knew it would be a long while before he would know anything. His mind was dark- he didn't want Tyler to be dragged into his problems.

"Brian," Tyler's southern drawl suddenly brought Brian back to reality, "hello, are you there?" He waved a hand in front of Brian's face, an eyebrow raised. BK took a deep breath and looked away. He wanted to say everything on his mind right then and there, but what good would it do? He cleared his throat and shook his head, rubbing the back of his neck as he did so.

"I'm sorry, man. Did you say something? I must've zoned out." He tried to play it off, leaning against the back of the couch and bringing the cold can to his lips. His hands were shaking and his eyes were dull but Tyler didn't ask. He could tell something was wrong, even after Bonds convinced him it was probably nothing. Tyler knew his best friend- he wasn't okay. Tyler could tell by his expression, however, that he wasn't ready to say anything. And he had to accept that, as hard as it was. He eventually let out a deep breath, nodding his head.

"Uh, yeah. I asked if you liked these chords. Here, I'll play it again." Tyler pulled his guitar back onto his lap and strummed it slowly, singing the lyrics in his head as he did so. Their fans were eager for new music, and they had been working on getting a new single out. They had each done some of their own writing while they were away on vacation. Brian had yet to share his half, but Tyler didn't want to pressure him. Once he finished playing the short melody, he looked back to Brian for approval. Brian, however, was looking out the window at nothing in particular. Tyler let out a sigh as he rolled his eyes. "BK. You're doing it again." Once more, Brian looked in Tyler's direction and straightened his posture.

"Sorry. Can we do this some other time? I'm really tired." Tyler watched as Brian sat his half-empty beer can on the table and stood up, brushing his palms on his jeans. He walked over to the bunk area and opened his suitcase, pulling out his favorite fringe jacket. Tyler studied him. He noticed his strange behaviors- almost as if he were a completely different person. He was acting very unusual.

"Well where are you going? We have to be on stage with Luke soon." Tyler's watched as Brian walked to the door. He was worried about him. Deeply. Brian made eye contact with Tyler. His blue eyes looked sad- ghostly. They didn't have that usual twinkle to them. He looked unhappy. And there was nothing Tyler could do about it.

"I'm gonna take a walk. I need the fresh air." He said simply, slowly putting his jacket on. He needed to clear his head- to find his happy place. He knew he'd feel better afterwards. He couldn't bare to stay in the same room as Tyler. Before he'd know it, he'd spill everything. And he'd regret it later when Tyler was tangled in the same mess he was. He didn't need to bring him into that.

"I thought you said you were tired?" Tyler chuckled, taking a sip from his own beer can. Brian paused in front of the door, before he turned towards Tyler once more. He wasn't good at making excuses. He was used to being transparent- honest even. It was hard for him, but he knew it would be best if he kept everything to himself in the long run. He didn't want to blow the situation out of proportion, even though there was no way it could possibly get worse.

"I am. I'll take a quick nap when I come back, and then I'll be fine. I promise." He shoved his hands into the warm pockets of his coat, studying Tyler's doubtful expression. He didn't want to hide anything from him- it was killing him. Slowly but surely, it would eat him inside out and it would be too late to say anything. But Tyler would find out eventually. He had to. It was best to let the truth come out when it came out. Just as he opened the door to the bus, he heard Tyler's voice.

"Do you want me to join you? I could use a walk too. It's been a long day." He sat down his beer can and stood up, reaching for his leather studded jacket that was draped over the arm of the couch. Brian avoided the look in his eyes- that concerned look that made Brian feel guilty. He contemplated whether or not it would be a good idea for the two of them to go on a walk. In silence. Where he would only want to say something. And sooner or later, somehow, Tyler would know everything. He realized seconds had passed, and he still hadn't said anything. It was a simple answer. 'Sure' or 'I'll be fine'. But which one would he choose? He knew Tyler would be suspicious, and would probably only worry more if he said no. If he said yes, although, he risked the temptation to spill his thoughts. So what will it be?

"Um, I-," Brian thought, looking at Tyler's eager face. He needed to say something. Quick. His mind was racing with various scenarios. Good turn outs and bad turn outs. Tyler pushed a strand of hair out of his face, as he watched Brian, an 'I'm waiting' expression upon his face. Suddenly, before Brian had a chance to make up his mind, there was a collected laughter outside the door of the bus. He could easily make out the voices of Justin, their photographer, Dan Weller, and Sean. Tyler turned his attention to the door, where Sean popped his head in.

"Five more minutes boys. Let's roll." He had on his cut off tee and sweat bands, prepared to rock out. Brian felt himself let out a sigh of relief. Saved by the bell. Again. He gave Sean a small nod and a thanks, before he turned to Tyler.

Tyler was already looking at him, one of his eyebrows raised. "I know," he began, "Maybe next time."