My Immortal || The Worst FanFiction of History || [With Commentary.]

[Chapter One Through Five] || With Commentary ||

Oh my god what the hell am I doing. I found a YouTuber who read this and I thought, why not re-find it, and write commentary over it? This will kill my brain cells. And it will kill yours too. I might actually make a serious over this if people like it and review some of the shittiest fanfics on FanFiction, Wattpad, Archive of our Own, or any other writing sites. If you like this, oh my god. If you dislike this, good. :D Because I do too. :D Doing this for the lawlz. No regrets. Maybe a little. I know I'm known for YouTuber fanfics, but this must be made! >]

Original writing will be in non-bold.

My commentary will be in brackets ( [ ] ) and bold text; the text that has actual grammar, spelling and punctuation is mine. xD.

Let us being this horrible idea of mine. Again, little regret. Enjoy >]

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                                                                                                [Chapter One]

AN: Special fangz (get it, coz Im goffik) [Goffik; is that a childish term of Gothic?] 2 my gf (ew not in that way) raven, bloodytearz666 4 helpin me wif da story and spelling. [Spelling. The spelling is horrific; this Ravin person did a horrible job, my dear.] U rok! Justin ur da luv of my deprzzing life u rok 2! MCR ROX! [Justin Beiber? No wonder; and really? My Chemical Romance. It's a good band, but seriously? Rox? You rox my sox off.]

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Hi my name is Ebony Dark'ness Dementia Raven Way [Wait a second. What kind of name is that? If I had that name, I'd change it; or laugh about it.] and I have long ebony black hair (that's how I got my name) with purple streaks and red tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like Amy Lee (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). [Grammar, woman! Such a long run-on. The description is okay but it's not needed. And this Mary Sue is an Amy Lee wanna be.~] I'm not related to Gerard Way but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. [The fuck.] I'm a vampire but my teeth are straight and white. I have pale white skin. I'm also a witch, [A witch and vampire hybrid. Kay.] and I go to a magic school called Hogwarts in England where I'm in the seventh year (I'm seventeen). I'm a goth (in case you couldn't tell) and I wear mostly black. I love Hot Topic and I buy all my clothes from there. [Does Hot Topic even exist in the Harry Potter world? Time traveler!] For example today I was wearing a black corset with matching lace around it and a black leather miniskirt, pink fishnets and black combat boots. I was wearing black lipstick, white foundation, black eyeliner and red eye shadow. [This is not needed. But okay.] I was walking outside Hogwarts. It was snowing and raining so there was no sun, [No shit, Sherlock. If the sun came out, you'd probably melt.] which I was very happy about. A lot of preps stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them. [You bitch.]

"Hey Ebony!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was.... Draco Malfoy! [Oh shit! Dun dun dun!]

"What's up Draco?" I asked.

"Nothing." he said shyly. [Draco is not shy. If he was Shy, He'd be named Draco Potter. Shy fuck.]

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away. [Later bitches. I gotta go away now for no reason what so ever.]

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                                                                                      [Chapter Two]