My Immortal || The Worst FanFiction of History || [With Commentary.]

[Chapter Twenty-Seven Through Thirty-Three] || With Written Commentary. ||

Again, God help me; getting closer and closer to the end. Thank god; I dunno how much more my brain can take.

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Chapter 27. vampirz wil never hurt u [What the fuck.]

AN: u no wut!111 I dnot giv a fok wut u prepz fink abot me!1111 [Then why are you writing this book?] so stup flaming da foking story bichez!1111 [Calling your so called fans bitches isn't nice, Tara; did I mention the original writers name was Tara? I can't spell her last name but. Yep. She fell off the face of the Earth; she's probably disappointed with this fanfic and decided to never come back.] fangz 2 raven 4 ur luv n sport [Sport?] n help i luv u gurl soz i kodnt update lol I wuz rly deprezzd n I silt muh rists I had 2 go 2 da hospital [You don't need to go to the hospital for slitting your wrists; the only time you go is if you hit a major vein in your arm and you begin to bleed out. A single few slits will just make the skin clot and turn into scabs rather quickly. How do I know this? Because I've done this before. Nice try on the guilt tripping.] rraven u rok gurl!11111111111111111111

XXXXXXXXXXX666XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX [The Devil isn't centered.]

Every1 in the room stated to cry happly- I had saved them. [Why the holy balls would they cry happily? Why not smile? Laugh? Walk away?] Drako, Lucian, Serious bond Vampire all came to hug me. The nurse started to give them medicine.

"Cum on Enoby." [Cum. No.] said Proffesor Sinatra. [Sinatra? ...Senorita..?] She was wearing a gothic blak leader dress [Dresses don't lead.] with a corset top and real vampir blood on it and fuking black platinum boots. [How the bloody tits do you get real Vampire blood? They're not real; oh wait. In Tara's mind their real. Fuck.] "I have to tell you the fucking perdition." [What is that word?]

I locked at Lucian, Serifs, [???] Drake and Vampire. They nodded.

I smelled happily [Smelled happily? Your nose doesn't have emotions.] and went into a dark room. I had changed Profesor Sinister took out some black cards. She started to look into a black crucible [Crystal.] ball. She said...........................[She said too many fucking dots for one paragraph.]  "Tara, [I thought her name was Ebony?] I see drak [Dank Memes.] times are near." She said badly. [Badly..? Tara, you don't need to add an 'ly' after the end of every little thing. Too many adverbs for one shitty book.] She peered into da balls. [Man ballz.] "You see, you must go back in time." She took out a Time-Toner [Time-Tuner.] like B'loody Mary had. "When Voldemint [He's now minty fresh!] was in Hogwarts before he became powerful he gut his hearth borken. Now do you fink he would still become Volxemort if he was in love?" I shook my head. "U must go back in time and sedouce him. It is the only way. If he is still evil then you must kill him. You can come to my room tomorrow and you can do it." [All of this interaction between whoever the fuck this is and EBONY, is really, really disgusting.]

"Okay." I said sadly. We did dethz tuch sin. I went outside again sadly.

"What fucking happened?" asked Draco and Vampire.

"Yeah what happened?" asked Darkness, Willow and Boldy Mary? [Boldy? Bald?]

I was about to tell them butt every1 was there. They were celebrating Lucian and Sirius being fond. Everyone was proud of me butt [Ass.] I jut wonted 2 talk 2 Draco. They were cheesing [Cheesing? Laughing.] my name and some reporters were there, trying to interview Dumblydore. [At least it's not Dumbledork or Dumbledum.] A banner was put up. Lotz of fucking prepz were there oviously tring 2 be b goffik wering the HIM sign on their handz- depite them not having akshelly [...Actually..] heard of him. Even Mr. Noris looked happy. A blak and red cake had been brought out. Crabbe and Goyke [Murder me please.] set up some fireworx in the shape of skulls from Wesley's Whizard Wises.