Hold Up, I Love You?

Fourteen.

(Chloe's POV)

Beca straddled my lap, grinding into me slowly as she kissed the sweet spot on my neck. I moaned as she ran a hand through my hair, the other making it's way up the back of my shirt and unclasping my bra. "I want to hear you moan again." Beca whispered in my ear, a husky tone to her voice. Beca pulled my shirt off and threw my bra to the side, then she placed herself between my legs and slowly pulled my yoga pants down. She ran her hands up my thighs and I let out a gasp, which made a smirk appear on Beca's face. She slowly placed a hand on my center and began rubbing over my panties with her thumb. "You're already so wet, Red." Beca bit her lip and I could feel myself getting hotter and hotter between my legs. The sensation coming from her touch was enough to make me moan and arch my back, which only made Beca rub harder and faster. She curled her fingers into the sides of my panties and began pulling them down slowly... slowly... slowly... "Chloe, let's go."

"What?" I muttered.

"Chloe, come on, we don't have time." Beca rolled her eyes. "CHLOE!"

I woke up with a start and looked over to see Aubrey standing over my bed. "Chlo, come on we have Bella's rehearsals in an hour. You need to get dressed."

I looked at her with a vacant stare as I tried to balance my breathing. I was still very excited about that dream... 
I've been having those dreams for the past week and a half, just a little bit after Beca and my fight. I know this is my mind telling me I need to go and get her back, but something is holding me back. I think of her constantly... I wonder if she thinks of me too. I wonder if she's been having the dreams that I have. I wonder if she misses me the way I miss her.

But I don't need her. She only wants me for sex. Aubrey was right, I know she was. 
"Yeah, okay. Just give me a few minutes, I'll be ready and we can head out the door. Sorry I slept in, I must have missed my alarm." I told Aubrey. Aubrey nodded and left the room, leaving me to get dressed.

---

I sat on the couch, tired as hell from the long Bella's rehearsal. Beca hasn't shown up for rehearsals since we had our fight. I don't know if I should find her and apologize, or if I should just let things simmer. Aubrey has been a big help, she's been here to watch stupid movies with me, to tell jokes and make me laugh, and to go on random little shopping trips with me. Aubrey has been exactly what I needed from Beca, which I did get occasionally, but mostly she just seemed very frustrated. I know now that it's because I wasn't putting out for her, and because I can't seem to remember a thing. 
But I can't stop this yearning for her. My heart is practically begging for her, but my head tells me to stay put. I'm so conflicted, and I'm trying to listen to my gut, but my gut has been silent.

"Chlo, I'm heading out with some friends, will you be okay alone?" Aubrey asked. I just gave her a small smile and a nod, and Aubrey made her way out of the apartment. As soon as she was gone I made my way to the bathroom and changed out of my sweaty Bella rehearsals clothes and quickly rinsed in the shower. Afterwards I got dressed and left the apartment. I didn't want to stay inside all day, and figured I could go for a nice walk.  
It was a little chilly outside so I wore jeans, a sweater, combat boots and a beanie that hung low in the back. I didn't really know where I was going, just that I wanted something to do. I just roamed the streets of Georgia, trying to find somewhere to go. 
I couldn't get those dreams out of my mind. The way they felt so real, as if Beca's body was really in between my legs, as if she was actually kissing my neck, or she was really running her fingers through my hair. As if it all actually happened.
Which it probably did at one point. In fact every dream I've had could be a memory. Which only proves Aubrey's point of her only wanting me for sex. I have yet to have a dream of us doing anything but each other... Not that I'm complaining, but if we're in love shouldn't we have something more than sex between us?